J.R.: 0:00

Hello and welcome back to another episode of 1000 Gurus with me, your host, JR Yonacruz. Today's guest is Joseph Lakhani Lau. Joseph Lakhani Lau, also known as JJ, but others in the nightlife and music industry know him as Milo. He's an open format DJ, an alumni and staff member of Academy of DJs, and he is also a member of the DJ collective Soul Control, a group of genre-fluid DJs that all share the same mentality to spread the love of new music and sounds while creating a safe space to express themselves through dance. So catching up with JJ was enjoyable.

J.R.: 0:32

It was an insightful episode for me, as he's my first live music performer slash DJ I've had on the show. I've had multiple singers on the show, but it was interesting to see JJ's career journey from being a musical art kid of sorts to having a career in the live music and nightlife scene. In addition to talking about his journey of figuring out what he wanted to do as a kid and eventually graduating from Academy DJs, we also chat about self-care, interests versus disinterests, boundaries and being your authentic self. If you're a fan of music and you consider yourself also an art kid, so to speak, I'm sure you'll enjoy this episode. So, without further ado, hope you enjoy this episode with JJ Lakhanilau. Welcome back to 1000 Gurus. Please welcome my guest JJ. Hey guys, my name is JJ.

JJ: 1:19

I also go by Milo.

J.R.: 1:20

Nice. How do you pronounce your name, Lakhan yeah.

JJ: 1:23

Yeah, so it's La-con-i-lao, la-con-i-lao, La-con-i-lao. Yeah, I just found out that it means. I think it means like the last star or something. I remember my… Interesting. Yeah, my aunt wrote that down at a Christmas party. It's something star, loosely translated.

J.R.: 1:41

Is it from like a certain dialect or like area?

JJ: 1:45

province. You know, I would like to believe, based on just family, it's Ilocano, but I don't quote me on that.

J.R.: 1:53

Yeah, that's all good you're like, I think so, I think so cool, all right, well, anyways, thank you for being here. I appreciate it. Thank you for having me. Yeah, glad to have you on the show, so I will go into how I know you. We already read your bio by now. So we met through dance a project team. They're both on KND, and so we danced together for season two for KINSA's K-Factor 2024 at UCLA, and then you're still doing stuff with them. You're going to perform at what is it?

JJ: 2:17

OC Japan OC Japan.

J.R.: 2:19

But yeah, as a fellow Filipino dancer with a two-letter name, I feel like we would vibe well and I think we did. I think we met. What is it like? End of 2023, right, or something like that 2023?.

JJ: 2:29

Yes, I think we met officially. After you guys performed, we ended up getting pocha.

J.R.: 2:37

Yeah, so wasn't that like Saki's birthday? Yes, yes.

J.R.: 2:41

Okay, so the reason why I remember this is because it was Saki's birthday and Saki and Yuki but while Yuki was on the show, let's just say, they drank a little bit too much in the parking lot and so we were taking care of them and then you and I connected and we were just talking a bit about like our aspirations and stuff like that. So it was really cool to connect with you and I know that you do DJing and nightlife stuff, so it was nice to hear that you were able to be on the show, because I feel like you have an interesting career.

J.R.: 3:03

Thank you, yeah, so we talked about our future goals and I respect that. You're constantly like on the grind. You're doing what you love, and you were telling me before this that you have plans on what you want to do this year and you're just constantly in the scene, which is dope Any clarifications on what else you're up to?

JJ: 3:20

Not really clarifications, yeah, it's just. It's slow season right now, for djing at least. Spring break is just around the corner, so preparing my schedule for that, but also, on the flip side, just prepping content, trying to start up a youtube channel next year, so I'm just like building up that backlog for it.

J.R.: 3:35

Nice dope and then by the end we can plug wherever you want to, or tell them what you're up to, so we'll get back to that. Thank you all right, so first topic, if nothing else. Oh, no, sorry, let's go into a video. Yes, so if you don't mind carrying this up. We are both featured here, so if you are, and that was it that was dope. We killed it. Second it Second place. Let's go Second place, yeah and okay. Just for the audience note, we were second place by 0.5 points. Oh my goodness.

JJ: 4:09

Right and first up.

J.R.: 4:11

Yeah, we were very first in the competition lineup. So second set but first of the competition lineup and we still got second place by 0.5. Insane, yeah.

JJ: 4:26

So I don 0.5 insane. Yeah. So I don't know. I think that's a testament to how dope we were. Yeah, it's also like having that, or having the judges like score you that high and you have the rest of the rest of the show, intermission, and then a whole second half and they were like, okay, one team maybe did slightly better, but other than that, like that's a pretty huge compliment, I would say, testament to our hard work.

J.R.: 4:42

So oh for sure, dope, I love that set. I know so good. All right, let's go into first topic. So, as with all my first time guests, like origin story, main influences, background, if you don't mind connecting the dots of where did you start off or what were you like main influences when you were younger. Connecting the dots to like where you are today or who you are today yeah, so I think I can pinpoint where my influences started.

JJ: 5:09

It was definitely in middle school when I saw my older cousin his name's adam. He was in the drama department. I saw a performance and he just flipped my whole world like complete 180 and I was like whoa, stage, that's what I want to do. So throughout middle school and then high school performed in musicals, plays, and that kind of elevated my interest in more things like dance, just like stage and just in the umbrella of everything. And then that's when I started getting into more hip hop dances and stuff with in my high school, in my all male, shout out Walnut High School, all male, and yeah, that kind of went all the way to college and throughout college dancing in and out.

JJ: 5:57

That's when I started becoming the designated aux cord. Becoming the designated aux cord, so queuing up music, making the party lively and then seeing my brother on his 21st birthday use a whole dj controller. I was just like trying to see what he was doing on his laptop. And then that kind of sparked my kind of like interest with djing and how he can blend this song and the next song like completely like seamlessly. And then COVID happened, so I borrowed his controller. Throughout all of that, went to YouTube university for DJing and then officially went to an actual school Academy of DJs in OC to learn the ropes, the history of anything and everything DJing and I am here now.

J.R.: 6:45

Yeah, really quick. Tangent Siblings, how many do you have?

JJ: 6:48

Yeah, so I'm the oldest out of three or out of two, not including me. So it's going to be me, my little brother Zach, and then my little sister Hillary.

J.R.: 7:01

Okay, okay.

JJ: 7:01

And then so you were the designated aux cord. Was that just by happenstance? I think so. So, I think so. I think everyone trusted my taste in music. And then, yeah, they were just like I remember, at one certain like I was on a dance team in college, so, like one party, they were just tired of playing off their ipads so they had me connect to bluetooth. And then I was just like, okay, let's get the party started. And then the party would probably go on until 2 am and I'm just like, guys, I have to go somewhere. Yeah, I don't want to stay here forever yeah, come on, let me go.

J.R.: 7:29

Yes, please. So then I guess let's take a step back. So let's say before college high school and then going into college. And then after college, what were your career aspirations or life aspirations at that point? So your mid high school level, like, like, what did you feel like you wanted to do, what did you feel like you were good at? And then college, like what was your major and or what you were, what were you trying to do at that point?

JJ: 7:52

Yeah, so mid high school, like end of high school, I was really set on trying the whole acting thing. For sure, that was going to auditions and that was in talks of like agent stuff just to help me with more bookings and stuff like that, but never really got to that. You were like performing and you were doing like musicals or something. Yeah, I was doing musicals, plays. I went to maybe four local auditions just for the local playhouses and stuff just to see if I could be able to. But luckily, shout out my drama teacher in high school. She had actual like real life experiences like outside, not just being a teacher but just directing and like producing and stuff like that.

JJ: 8:30

So she prepped us for the real world and she told us like 80% is going to be a no, but there's going to be like that rare 20% where you'll be able to book. So I had that expectation going into real world auditions out of high school. So I had that expectation going into real world auditions out of high school. And, yeah, I think it was just butting heads traditional Filipino parents butting heads of what I would like to do, what they would like me to do, and what do they want you to do or what do they imagine for you. So many different things besides, whatever.

J.R.: 8:58

Like literally everything else.

JJ: 8:59

Literally everything else. I've gotten a computer engineer. I've gotten aviation expert. I've gotten computer engineer. I've gotten aviation expert. I've gotten postman Literally anything they could throw at me instead of trying this creative output that I was so passionately on trying to do. Do you sing? I used to. I could carry a tune, for sure, but not professionally.

J.R.: 9:24

If you told me to sing right now it'd probably be really bad. Just the standard Filipino genetics, but nothing on top of that. Nothing on top gotcha. Okay, so you were aspiring to go into acting and whatnot. And then so in college, what was your mindset there? Like major, wise, or career at that?

JJ: 9:38

point. So I had to deal with my parents to be like, hey, you could still try the acting thing, you could still try to do auditions and stuff. I would just like you to do some of these like core classes, because I only went to community college so I was only doing like the pre-reqs core classes and then just to fill that creative outlet void, I had my theater classes. So originally I went to school for computer engineering just to please my parents and stuff. Then I flipped the switch on them where I was just like let's learn the business side, like marketing, just so if there's ever a chance where I do get an agent, I can know the ins and outs and not be swindled in that sense.

JJ: 10:17

But that didn't work out either because prerequisites overlapped like core classes and it started just getting like pretty tough mentally about what am I doing? Am I doing this for me or am I doing this to just please my parents? So yeah, I think I didn't really have a set idea or set major going into community college. But yeah, I think I was one foot out the door but also trying to. I was having like a what do you call it like?

J.R.: 10:41

a career crisis. Yes, career crisis for sure. Yeah, as I feel like most college students going through that are similar to I. Was just hanging out with some of my team earlier and it's the same thing. Yeah, four of them all career crisis. Yeah, yeah, I'm this major, but I also don't really know what I want to do, so I'm going to try things out and like that's what you should be doing.

J.R.: 10:59

You should be trying stuff out yeah so then, so you're like looking at different things and then so you graduate, or you graduate, or I did not.

JJ: 11:06

So, yeah, I did not graduate college, I didn't finish college, but through like friends from my dance team, I was able to get a job. So I wasn't like not doing anything with my life, so it was just providing for myself at that point but also taking a break from like the school systems and stuff like that of just like me trying to figure out what path is right for me and if that means like getting a mentor and not really like finishing a school in that sense then, that's perfectly okay with me, yeah so you're like uh, I don't want to say this like an art kid, like an artsy kid, like you know.

J.R.: 11:40

For sure more creative, but you're still not sure what you really wanted to do. Or like your quote-unquote place in the marketplace, yeah, all right. So then, eventually, you stumbled upon music. Like you said, what do you think? Or the way your brain is wired, I guess, from a self-awareness point of view, what do you think lends yourself to going towards? Like music? I don't know if that question makes sense it it does.

JJ: 12:01

So I think what kind of pushes me for like me for music is just because there's so many different avenues you could take with music. I had a really good conversation with one of my friends from academy of djs, where music doesn't necessarily mean producing. It doesn't well, it means producing but it doesn't necessarily means producing in an artistic, for, like artists kind of standpoint. You there's producing music for commercials, producing music for jingles, scores you know what I'm saying like for movies and stuff like that. So many different avenues. And then also for the love of music, it's what is the visual aspect of that and that can go into fashion, that can go into graphic design, that could go into like, oh, like for a stage production, like going back to musicals, like how lighting, like it can go into so many different creative avenues that just pique my interests in that kind of sense. So I think that's what pushes me still towards music where it doesn't have to necessarily be so, for example, like a metro boom in, or like, uh, take heath, like famous producers, where they just make beats, or DJ Mustard. It could be more on avenues of more niche things in my opinion.

J.R.: 13:10

So there's a lot of ways you can use that and a lot of avenues that people might not know about, but you can do a lot with it.

JJ: 13:16

For sure, I like that.

J.R.: 13:18

So now switching over I'm not switching over, but I guess, continuing on the topic of DJing, my next series of questions is basically so you told us you picked up DJing and then eventually went to Academy of DJs. I guess, what age were you at? What is Academy of DJs? And then, what did you learn through that process?

JJ: 13:35

Oh, wow, okay. So I'm 28 right now. I probably joined Academy of DJs when I just turned. Probably joined Academy DJs when I just turned 20. No, I think I was 26, going on 27.

J.R.: 13:49

Okay, but did you start DJing.

JJ: 13:50

Before that I did a little bit, yeah, so just like dabbling, yeah, dabbling in it Bedroom DJ. I was like putting out mixes on SoundCloud just for my own kind of like enjoyment, just to hear back like what I created, but also to hey, hey, I'm pretty like semi-serious about this, so if my friends want to take a listen, it's on SoundCloud. But yeah, it was on again, like I said, youtube University just watching countless hours of just DJ tutorials and like matching it on like this like really basic, like DJ board that you could just plug in and play on your laptop. And yeah, I was like there for the whole quarantine probably. And then I got a couple of opportunities to like actually DJ in like social settings, like bars and stuff like that, prior into getting into Academy of DJs for season 12.

J.R.: 14:38

Cool, all right, so now, what is Academy of DJs? And then, what did you? What is that process of? What do you learn? What is the whole thing?

JJ: 14:51

Yeah, so, oh my gosh. I could go on and on about that, but I found out about academy djs just through word of mouth. Like a lot of the people in the dance community here in the laoc area, either it's funny. They either make a switch into djing or they become like a physical therapist because of, like the whole not that, am I wrong?

J.R.: 15:06

no, you're not wrong, because not that.

JJ: 15:08

I've had a ton of physical therapist friends who do the same thing yeah, but it's common because, oh, you know what your body does and you know how to take care of it. Let's be a pt, or you still love dance and you still love music. What do you become? A dj. So I went the dj route and, yeah, they, I knew them through word of mouth and then actually I applied first for season 10.

JJ: 15:29

Season 10 was a little bit before COVID and I finally, enough, got accepted, but sadly that's when the world shut down. I was also having. I was also planning to go on a trip to the Philippines with my partner, lauren and she. We were going to be gone for the first month of when Academy was supposed to start. So I talked to the guy his name is Dho and I was just like, hey, I might miss the first month. Is that okay? Can I like catch up on work and stuff like that, because I really want to do this? He was like, ah, the first month is crucial. And at that point in time I was like, damn, okay, I'll just reapply. Then Hopefully you guys accept me.

JJ: 16:08

Fast forward to season 12. They do accept me. And now I understand why that month is so crucial, because that's when you have one-on-ones with your staff. You have one-on-ones with your class and, like, through the whole process, I was able to learn different equipment like turntables, club equipment like CDJs, and I was able to learn the history of it. They teach you the history as well as real life application, like how to set up speakers for, like, weddings, and how to troubleshoot the equipment just in case. Like, not everything is like supposed to be where it's at.

J.R.: 16:41

Okay, so it's a very hands-on technical approach to be where it's at. Okay, so it's a very hands-on technical approach, like here's the equipment, how to actually be dj, some stuff that you might have to learn like on the fly if you were just trying to I don't know bootstrap this thing by yourself, but they're like.

J.R.: 16:54

Here's literally what you need to know yeah, I see okay, and so I can infer that if you're saying, like season 10, season 12, is it like each season is a different cohort of people who go through it? So what is that? I guess what? One, what is the application process like? And then two, what is that sort of cohort experience like, like how many people and how long does it?

JJ: 17:14

last. So this is actually where this actually felt like a real school, because they only accept well, now they accept 14, but during my season I think our season was the last one to accept only 12 and they now being a staff member for academy djs and like a teacher and a mentor, the applications can span between three to four hundred applicants. So being one of the rare 12 to get chosen for that kind of actually felt like I got accepted to like my dream school. You know, like I never got that experience, but that's what it felt like of just oh god, I hope they accept me yeah, what's the application process like?

JJ: 17:53

oh yeah, so it's just, they just give you a form because they're very open to people with experience, people without experience. So they, you just fill out. I think now it's like a google form of what do you want to get out of this, what makes you alive? Like these, like formal, get to know you questions, and then after that there's an interview process. You can get interviewed by one of the three members on management and then, if you do well on the interview, the one-on-one interview with them then they make the executive decision to either keep you on for the season or respectfully ask to apply like another time.

J.R.: 18:25

Okay, so it's a, it's a formal application and then an interview, and then whether or not, you get on. How long does this program last?

JJ: 18:32

About six to seven months.

J.R.: 18:34

So it's very like how often? What is it Every Sunday? Oh, every Sunday.

JJ: 18:37

Every Sunday to a point. So I want to say maybe the first three to four months is just Sundays and that's like learning the ins and outs, like learning the equipment, learning the history stuff, like that. And then the last half is mentorships, so you get paired up with a staff member and then they help you create your very first set that you're going to perform for your graduation, which they call Grad Fest, and it's just 15 minutes of you just performing in front of your friends and family, with 100% production like lasers, lights, visuals, your logo and yeah, they have a full like promo day so they get your headshots and then they post like a big flyer of you to promote the.

J.R.: 19:20

GradFest. Okay, so I guess, on that, what do you feel like was the biggest thing, or maybe a handful of things you've learned that were super valuable for you in that experience of Academy DJs.

JJ: 19:32

Yeah, a really big thing that I learned was timing is everything. Timing in the sense of like how I got accepted when I got accepted and like the whole rollout after that. So I think if I was, if the universe wanted me to be in season 10, then I would be in season 10. But I don't think they wanted me. I don't think the universe or any other higher power wanted me to be there that time. So when I did apply, it was, oh, these are the people that are going to influence you for maybe the rest of your life. And that also includes, like my mentor, that includes like everyone that was on staff that season, and I think they all still to this day like what? Now we're going to be on season 17 coming up soon. Yeah, after maybe five seasons, they're still doing the same thing and they're still pushing me to become like the artist or like the creative person that they see and I don't necessarily see that makes sense, okay.

J.R.: 20:33

So that mentorship was like really big for you and the guidance for sure nice what is crowd work vibing? How much does crowd work vibing count in the class?

JJ: 20:43

oh, so crowd work and vibing I can take that in one or two ways. Crowd reading I'm still trying to get good at it. Crowd reading in a sense of like when I'm doing a set, how certain people are picking up on it. Oh, it's very it's. I like broke this down to some of my students where I feel like djing, even though it is fun and it has this really big spectacle of everything.

J.R.: 21:07

Oh, hey, look at that there, there you go.

JJ: 21:11

Yeah, oh my gosh Shout out. That was yeah, that's a party in LA.

J.R.: 21:15

Oh, Dance in LA. Oh, there you go. That was at the Hilton.

JJ: 21:18

I believe it looks like it's in LA.

JJ: 21:19

It was yeah, just the view and everything is just so nice. And we I think this was we did a day party here for one of my friend events called strike a jive. They are also alumni of academy of djs I digress, but anyways, yeah. So crowd reading and vibing, it becomes very psychological. Even though djing is put on this like grand scale and like big lights, flashy lights, like artists, you are the artist kind of vibe.

JJ: 21:44

But for some of us, like local djs and like still trying to get our names out, it's it depends on where you are in the time slot. So if you're opening the nightclub and five or six people are like coming in and then it starts to gradually becoming a little bit more packed, I'm not going to be playing so much high energy music and that's me building the night. I'm not going to start off with crazy high energy hip hop. Let's funnel people in. Let's show, show them that they're gonna have a good time by playing like nice little chill r&b throwbacks. Everyone loves a sing-along, so this is like a moment for you to get your drinks buckle up because we're gonna have it's gonna be a long night, I see. So it becomes very psychological. Are people dancing right now? Or are they going to the bar, because it's not a bad thing if they're going to a bar, but it also means they're not necessarily listening Right Like they're not in the music right now.

JJ: 22:34

Yeah, my job is to have people in the dance floor dancing and having a good time.

J.R.: 22:39

So then, when you're in the heat of it, right like the meat of the night, so then how do you do crowd worker vibing?

JJ: 22:49

Is it just like trial and error? How do you see the person? Yeah, so I think it does come with experience, because obviously I'm still trying to learn how to crowd read. But for me personally I like to hit little pockets of people and that kind of depends on crowd reaction.

JJ: 23:01

So if people are really into hip hop and like I see people jumping around, okay, let's keep this vibe, and then I'll get like an idea in my head of a transition or like a mashup that goes into maybe like a different genre. It's just like test the waters, see what people are feeling, and if the EDM drop hits and everyone's jumping up and having good times, ok, let's keep this vibe, but that's. I don't want to like tire everyone out because if I'm in the meat of it there's probably another DJ after me. So I don't want them to be like completely tired out where they literally leave after my set. So I would not play like a complete EDM set. I would probably play like one or two songs and then go back to like more of the hype hip hop, r&b kind of stuff.

J.R.: 23:44

I see I'm curious as a DJ when you go to other events or clubbing events, like how do you, what is like the audience perspective of watching another DJ do their set? Yeah, are you hypercritical? Or you're like, oh, this is fine. Or are you like I would have done this differently? You know what I mean? Oh my gosh.

JJ: 24:02

I'll be completely honest. I'm pretty critical, but I like to keep my opinions to myself. Obviously I don't know anyone of the background, but if I do, if they're an alumni of academy, I know they were in good hands. But if I'm seeing like someone for the first time that I've never seen spin before, I would listen, but I wouldn't also show that on my face. I will still keep dancing, keep vibing. I don't want to be that one guy in the crowd with a drink, just like what are you doing? Yeah, just what is happening.

J.R.: 24:29

I can't be like that.

JJ: 24:30

I'm always here, I'm always, I'm always down to support other djs and to listen to new sounds. So I'm dancing, but I'm also I picked up on like a skill while in academy djs of like active listening. So it's not necessarily visualizing and like having to look at what the dj is doing. But if I'm like on the dance floor and the DJ booth is all on stage, like I'm actively listening to hear of oh, he's bringing in the next song, oh, he's lowering this EQ, and then this EQ, okay, that works. And then kind of like making a mental note of that, of just, okay, always a student. So I'm just jotting it down in my brain of okay, I liked how that sounded nice.

J.R.: 25:11

Yeah, as a student of the craft, it's always a good thing to do. Yeah, last few questions on this is so what are some of the biggest challenges you face as you are expanding your career in nightlife and djing and music and whatnot, and what are some of the biggest lessons you've learned overall? And I guess the follow-up to that is any advice you have for other people who want to get into what you do?

JJ: 25:31

yeah, I think one of the biggest challenges, probably still to this day, is the monster of social media. I think a lot of people are really now utilizing social media as like their resume, which I totally understand and like I'm, I've mixed my DJ and my personal stuff together, so I, even though it might look like a resume, it's not necessarily all DJing and I don't know if that's a detriment or a good thing or a bad thing, but that's just like who I am as a person. This is my personal life, but also I'm spinning on this place on Friday to come through. So I think, just navigating that of what content hits is it mashups or is it more of trying to teach people how to djing? Like cool little tips and tricks and stuff like that? I think it's like what avenue do I take to have people engaged content wise?

JJ: 26:21

Because I would say maybe a little bit like the last couple no, probably the last half of the year all I've been doing was just being to myself but also posting where I'm going to be playing and that's not necessarily like enough. Like you have to show people that you do do this for a living, so it's like giving them a reason to come out. I'm not really the best at that, so that's something I'm still working on, but at least I'm aware of showing people that I actually have been doing this. So if you, you want more of this, come out on a Friday, come out on a Saturday. Yeah, and I think something. I'm still sorry. What was the other half?

J.R.: 26:58

So, yeah, like lessons learned the biggest things that you've learned on this career. After that as advice to other people, yeah.

JJ: 27:04

So I think, while on this career, I do believe in taking a break, because it is long hours, long hours, as in maybe using that time to practice, but also I'm really big on supporting. So it's like being out almost every weekend. But everyone needs a mental break and that's either me taking a month away from the decks or like taking a week away from the decks, or taking like a month off from just gigs. In general, I do think a mental reset is crucial, even though I do respect the hustle of a lot of people like they have the energy to go out. By all means go out. Me personally, my social battery gets depleted, especially if it's like Friday, saturday.

JJ: 27:45

Sunday or, and then the next week, thursday, friday, saturday I'm just like I just need to wind down play Marvel Rivals, or'm just like I just need to wind down play marvel rivals, or something like. I just need to shut my brain off and not necessarily think about what's the next gig, what's this, what's this? As long as I feel like I'm still content on where I'm at and like my skill set and my practicing isn't really negating my skill set, then I think I'm okay. And advice, advice, I would have to anyone that wants to try DJing or have that as like a career. I would say go for it.

JJ: 28:18

I would say, but also protect your peace, because I'm not saying all promoters are like this, but you will get some promoters that are like just in it for like the money. I would say, maybe take a couple gigs for the hell of it, just to see if you can do it for an hour or so, and then, once you feel comfortable, remaining a student, learning new ways to transition and also learning new ways to, or learning new ins and outs of, like different equipment, because not every club is the same, so they're not going to have the same equipment every club, so getting to know the ins and outs of equipment. I think are two really big things Protecting your peace and knowing your equipment for sure. Nice.

J.R.: 28:57

I like it Okay. So that's a good transition into the next topic, which is I grouped this together, so this is something that you mentioned. You might want to talk about Self-awareness, trends, interests and boundaries. So could you elaborate on this idea of being unapologetically yourself and not feeling the need to conform to quick trends?

JJ: 29:17

Yeah, so I think I've just recently started being comfortable in my own skin. I think it's again unapologetically liking what I like and not being so soft-spoken about it. Just a couple of things off rip.

JJ: 29:30

I love D&D, I love wrestling and I love wrestling and I love music and djing man of culture you know, unapologetically I love wwe and then on every couple saturdays I roll dice with my friends and that's like something that unapologetically I will talk hours and hours on. But I think it's because I was so soft spoken about those things, about liking geeky and nerdy things or like liking really niche things like wrestling and stuff like that, because I always had something in the back of my mind it's just a lot, people don't really like this kind of stuff. I can't really like connect with people on this. I think because that part of my brain was so loud at that point I was like, oh, I can't really, I can't really touch base on this because either one, people aren't going to connect with it or two, I'm going to look like a complete outsider, weirdo kind of vibe. But I think now it's a little bit more like encouraged to start speaking about like the niche things that you like at least for me, if you can go like two hours or like an hour just like talking about your favorite thing and I can see that you're like passionate about it I was just like Whoa, tell me more.

JJ: 30:33

Like the energy you give off of that just makes it a little bit more inviting and a little bit more. You know it's I don't know if I don't know if this is going to be really outdated, but it's like there's this video of this guy. He like bumps into another guy and he's just, oh, like why do you want to know about me and my girl? You want to know about me and my girl? And then he asks him something about oh, how did you meet? Like he asked the guy, oh, how did you meet? And then he like completely like lights up and he's just, oh yeah, so we like met, like on our first day, and it's all like.

JJ: 30:58

That kind of energy and that kind of like invitefulness is, I think, what a lot of people are scared to talk about, like their very niche interests. Like that everyone is like putting on like a front. But if you just be yourself, you also invite that energy, you also invite like that comfortableness and I think, because I talk so so much about the stuff that I like and I'm very vocal about it, it just gives off that energy of oh, this is something I'm passionate about what are some what is, and then it goes until oh. So what are you passionate about? Passionate about what are some what is, and then it goes until oh. So what are you passionate about? And not having to like worry about who's this guy gonna judge me for liking what I like? It's no like.

J.R.: 31:36

I just told you what I like and this is a safe space yeah, so it's getting out of our own heads of what are people thinking of me and judging me for my interests. But you're saying, in the long run, or being passionate and speaking on what you enjoy and being unapologetically into those things will allow you to connect better and deeper with people. Yeah, and also, people probably don't judge you as hard as you think and if they do, then you're probably not your friends anyways.

JJ: 32:01

Exactly so yeah, it's like a good like gauge on people if you ask, oh, what are you passionate about? And I just go on and on about dnd and I see that person check out. It was a pleasure.

J.R.: 32:10

It was a pleasure like okay, maybe not too deep in that yeah, maybe not too deep but yeah, what advice would you give to people who, like, aspire to be themselves, but they do have that?

JJ: 32:21

I think for a lot of people it's the, the social anxiety of, yeah, wanting to be liked and accepted yeah, I think social anxiety is always going to be a thing I I still struggle with sometimes social anxiety when I'm in a space where it's just a lot of new faces. But what I will say about that is but I will say it's like wow, sorry, I just totally had a brain fart. I still had a brain fart.

J.R.: 32:47

Maybe I'll throw in something there too. I think we already covered this. But being yourself, I feel like there's this mental burden that you have when you're trying to hide yourself, but when you're authentically yourself and I think this is also what you're saying is it frees you, but also the energy is a lot better and you actually can connect with people around you even better when you are yourself. Yeah, and I guess my two cents on how to be more yourself, I think it's just lean into that as much as you can. And also I think, like your friends, who, around you, will support you in what you enjoy, and you lighting yourself up will also light them up and inspire them to also be authentically themselves I think it's like a win-win right.

JJ: 33:23

Yeah, for sure yeah, I also think it's like very mentally draining to keep putting on fronts and they like like circles back with like djing, because like for an hour you're like the main character and then as soon as like the next dj's on, it's okay, you're back. So it's not having that kind of like imposter syndrome, even though it's like a given sometimes. It's not having it's like knowing when to ground yourself. I guess, and I think being unapologetically yourself is very grounding and it also yeah, it also you just it's just like having that afterglow. It's like having like, as soon as you start talking passionately about something, something that you really like, like there's something very attractive about that, like energy wise I like that and then you bring up the whole main character for an hour or whatnot.

J.R.: 34:04

As an introvert I'm like I can see why I'd be drained at the end of the weekend.

JJ: 34:07

Like dang an hour of being the main character of this whole scene, I would definitely feel drained to maybe, yeah, 200 people just like looking at you, like, and then you also just have the random people that like are requesting for songs.

J.R.: 34:23

I'm just like we'll see if it happens we'll see, I'll do my best, but yeah, I'll do my best yeah the next thing I want to ask about is clarifying on this idea of owning your interests and creating boundaries with this interest, so I get the whole owning your interest, so I can make assumptions, but do you want to give your thoughts on those?

JJ: 34:43

yeah, owning your interests. Again it goes back to being truly, like, passionate about you, your interests, and I think for some people that's it goes into the lines of oversharing and some people really just get turned off about that. It's just, oh, I was just here to just you're a friend of a friend, like why are we, like it's too deep, right?

J.R.: 35:01

yeah, I just want to say, hi not the time and place.

JJ: 35:04

But obviously, when you get passionate about something, it's like you ramble and you can't stop until you literally have to be like, oh, I have to take two steps back. You know what I'm saying. So I think creating that boundary, especially when you can gauge it from the other person, is very like healthy too, because I think also through, like personal experiences, like not everyone's cup of tea, are your interests and that's totally fine, that's totally fine, it's just now, it's having that mental note and knowing what to talk to them about. And if, like you guys do have the same interest like, for example, it's music and it's like certain artists and stuff like that that's something for sure you can connect on. But I know for sure I can't connect, like I can't talk wrestling with you but, yeah, that's like creating that boundary and it's also creating that boundary.

JJ: 35:50

Boundary is a good word, but I think the word that comes to mind is it's like the same thing as like arms reach a little bit. It's like some people get really turned off by like my interests and stuff like that. So I think just with my personal trauma and stuff like that, just knowing when to n, with my personal trauma and stuff like that, just knowing when to nip it in the bud or keep that at arm's reach, is more of it's a double-edged sword for sure.

J.R.: 36:12

What about this idea of creating boundaries with disinterests?

JJ: 36:16

Yeah, so with disinterest, it's like more of the lines of what I said. It's like disinterests like if I take someone that I didn't know that doesn't, for example, marvel movies, and they go out with me to a Marvel movie, it's like making that boundary of oh, they're not gonna like me, not knowing that I think they're gonna have a good time and oh, this is gonna be fun for if they're just there just to just hang out with friends. Like obviously that's fun, but it's also like now it's kind of an awkward situation.

J.R.: 36:46

A little bit. Yeah, it's not communicated. I guess what in this situation? What they're disinterested? In and you don't want to make you feel bad if I put them in a situation. Yeah, I don't want to force this interest on you, exactly. So, I think, is it the same the other way too?

JJ: 37:06

it's okay, maybe my friend's into this, but I'm not just communicating that, okay, I'm not that into it, but I'll come out or whatever. Yeah, I think for sure, especially for me, like if it's something I don't even I have zero knowledge of and I've never even experienced it, one or two tries doesn't, even it's one or two tries doesn't hurt anybody. I would rather try it and know that it's like something that I'm not very comfortable with or not my cup of tea, but at least I gave it those one or two tries, like at least I toughed it out, I tried it and I'll let that be your interest and then I'll do my thing over here. But that's not me, like totally bagging on yourself like what is this?

JJ: 37:42

it's more or less of that is going to be your space and I'm going to respect that. So it's. I will not excuse me, force myself upon that where I know I'm gonna just be like dead, yeah, be like miserable or something. Yeah, like, and obviously, like people can read that energy, like it's. Some people think they're really good at hiding it, but you, I personally will feel it. I'm just like and that's me like now, checking up on you every time and, hey, are you okay? Is everything good? Do you want you want to grab like some food after and then like it just, I would say sometimes, for better, for worse, put me in like lackluster situations, but one or two tries doesn't hurt anybody and I think for some people to not even take that chance or to take that chance of trying, then it's okay man, like at least try it before you can actually say I don't want to do this, like both sides right, yeah, giving it a shot.

J.R.: 38:33

But also, okay, I don't think somebody thinks self-awareness yeah, for sure. I want to go back to this idea of quick trends. Do you have? An example of what you mean by that, like conforming to quick trends if we can cover it.

JJ: 38:44

Yes, conforming to quick trends. I think that's just under the umbrella of like social media. I think, just because everyone is like on social media probably every day, it's what is the new sound. I think conforming to quick trends in a DJ perspective is getting a very trendy audio and like mixing it with something.

JJ: 39:01

Oh, I see, you know what I'm saying. Like this song or this thing is hype, so let me kind of leverage that. I like right now the very popular at this point in time is the little wayne song, the. I was just gonna say it's just drake saying oh, and then it goes, and then it goes into the instrumental, yeah, but you know what I'm talking about, right, but it's that, but like from a dj's point of view and from a DJ's kind of like content, it's like mixing maybe like an acapella with that instrumental and then having it pop off because it's a trending audio.

J.R.: 39:33

I see that happen a lot where it's like a trending, like Squid Game, and then the soundtrack.

JJ: 39:36

Yeah.

J.R.: 39:37

It's a big thing, so, but you're saying like that's not what you should do, or yeah?

JJ: 39:43

I mean, it's for some people. For sure, I think it's definitely a tool to get their work out, but also I don't think there's longevity in that. I see, I think the thing that I want to build is like community and like longevity, with where I want to take djing and like music. Like I want to build a community but I also want it to live as long as I, as long as humanly possible, and quick trends yeah, that's cool for the time, but give it like maybe three months, maybe even less than it's okay. What do you have to show?

J.R.: 40:13

for it. You did a trend and it blew up, but what?

JJ: 40:16

yeah, and I think that also goes with making like just strictly, just no hate again. Like this is no shade, it's just having one mashup in your room and, yeah, it could get like viral and it could get popular. But it's also like people don't. Obviously, when people are doing scrolling, they're not really thinking about, oh, how many takes did that take and how did you get clean audio and did you record this? And, like some people, this that's what I think about all the time.

JJ: 40:42

This it's funny too because like, sometimes, like at least for DJ TikTok and something like that, like some of the alumni like on the Academy DJ group chat, we'll just we'll send each other videos and it's just there's nothing plugged into the mixer. How's he doing this? This is, this doesn't make sense. So, yeah, obviously some people like do fake it for likes, but also people it's like how long did you take to prepare this, practice this and then edit it? And I think that just it doesn't in the real world of djing real world, quote, unquote it's it doesn't provide you any like. Yeah, it provides you maybe the eyes and the likes.

J.R.: 41:18

Yeah, for the short term, but not the longevity.

JJ: 41:20

It's okay, now put that person who did that mashup for a 30 second mashup and put them in front of a crowd and see if they could do it for an hour, right because those are different mediums, different intentions of that artwork yeah, but it's like you bought a dj board. Are you just using it to just do the quick mashups or are you gonna? Are you actually like trying to? Is this like a cool idea that you had that you can later do in an hour-long set, right, I?

J.R.: 41:43

like that. So it's thinking of the short-term versus the long-term and balancing that out. Yeah, I like it.

JJ: 41:50

Okay.

J.R.: 41:50

Any last thoughts on that before we go to rapid-fire questions Any final takeaways on DJing. We'll go back to it. We have final takeaways at the end. I think for DJs I like where we're at.

JJ: 41:59

Yeah, I like where we're at, for sure.

J.R.: 42:01

I learned a lot. Okay, Rapid fire questions. First one billboard question. If you could put up a sign for millions of people to see, what would it say?

JJ: 42:09

For millions of people to see. What would it say? Just like a random question Anything, anything, anything. Mine would be so head ass. It'd probably be like top three fast food chains. What are your top three fast food chains that could like tell me so much about a? Person, just make them think, yeah, like you would put shake shack over in and out no shade to shake shack.

J.R.: 42:32

I love shake shack, but like.

JJ: 42:33

I'm not like the accessibility I have with in and out over shake shack is why in and out is above shake shack.

J.R.: 42:39

I like it cool. Next one what is one of the hardest challenges you face in your life and would you learn from it?

JJ: 42:47

Hardest challenges I faced in life has been the constant battle between my career choices with my parents and I think I've overcame that by having them be at my graduation for Academy of DJs and they finally saw that, oh, he's very passionate in doing this and, like a lot of people can see that he's very passionate about doing this. There's nothing wrong with letting him have this chance and having this chance to like prove us wrong instead of having the traditional nurse like traditional job career choice.

J.R.: 43:19

Self-inflicted wound what is? Do you have a story about something that's gone wrong in your life? That was your own fault and you can't blame anyone else?

JJ: 43:26

yes, so I'm really bad with money, something I'm still working on and, yeah, I just when something comes up and it just really just piques my interest. Sadly, money is going to go towards that. Is it the best financial decision? Probably Probably not, but we're working on that and I'm trying to hold back from spending. I like it.

J.R.: 43:50

If you could give your younger self advice, what would it be now?

JJ: 43:55

I would say trust yourself and trust your vision, because, even though it's not going to be directly what you would like, at least you still have that creative output. Because I know you thrive on that.

J.R.: 44:11

I like it in the last few years. What new belief, behavior or habit has improved your life? New- belief habit or behavior behavior.

JJ: 44:22

yeah, I think it goes back to mental breaks. I think I've I think I was on such a big high after I graduated academy of djs I'm just I need to like be in tune with everything and everything around me. I think that is still true, but there's also room for mental breaks, and that's playing video games, that's literally taking a nap, maybe, and also just practicing. I feel like I could just practice like in my home setup and just turn my brain off and just, even though I'm still proactive on like where I want to be. That's like my mental reset. There's no expectations, there's no judgment, so just mix for an hour and then, yeah, just breathe.

J.R.: 45:03

How do you define success and who would you call successful?

JJ: 45:07

Hmm, Wow, I would say what defines success is if your career or if your job doesn't feel like a job or career. I think that's like where I can put my like expectations on success of, just because that's something that I want to achieve and that's something that brings me joy and that's obviously the end goal. Someone that I know, or, sorry, you said who's someone that is successful, I guess, per your definition, per my definition, Any example.

JJ: 45:43

I had a good conversation with him. But the guy that started academy of djs, dave deho he has this long legacy of academy of djs. He started three clubs and he doesn't have to be. We had this conversation and he said he had to be a little bit more of like the no person, that yet the like, very cutthroat kind of guy. But I think now, especially with the conversation we had, and he was very open about saying that he's very comfortable with where he is right now, I think that's the definition of success. It's like leaving a legacy of something that you enjoy and that can like outlive you, and that's something that he's currently doing and is still doing 17 seasons later in academy. Tj's crazy, yeah all right.

J.R.: 46:27

If you knew you couldn't fail, what would you be trying or what would you be doing right now? Oh, musicals.

JJ: 46:34

If I know I couldn't fail musicals and if I know I would absolutely. If I know I couldn't fail and I got my dream role, I would for sure audition broadway like today.

J.R.: 46:46

Do you have a favorite musical?

JJ: 46:49

oh my gosh, my favorite musical as of right now is hadestown. Hadestown, it's based off this like greek mythology about oh my gosh, I'm gonna butcher their names, but it's eurydices and it's kind of like those kinds of names. So right now it's just style wise. It's like very how would I say it's oh my gosh, how do I?

J.R.: 47:11

I'm already drawing a place on how to describe it.

JJ: 47:13

But yes, hadestown it's like a love story, but it's also like to like overcoming your own expectations, because I believe the main female lead and the male female lead, they're like in hell, it's like Hades, so it's like they're trying to get out of it and, yeah, I don't want to ruin the plot or the ending, but literally yeah, just the music is so good and I think I really resonate on some of the themes.

JJ: 47:43

And applying that to real life because that's something I've learned in theater it's just like how do you see yourself in this character and how can you portray that? As that character which is very cool and it's a good kind of like mental gymnastics. I like it.

J.R.: 48:01

Next one follow up to that is if you knew you would fail, what would you still be doing anyway DJing Nice. I like it. Next one follow-up to that is if you knew you would fail, what would you still be doing anyway djing nice I like it djing for sure what is one thing that you've been pondering deeply recently, if anything?

JJ: 48:15

pondering recently, something that's on your mind. I think I'm always pondering my ideas. I think it's. I think it's ideas, pondering my ideas. I think it's. I think it's ideas for DJing, ideas for DJing content stuff. I do want to start like a YouTube channel. So it's like pondering, like my expectations, but also like I I get a little bit more pessimistic about my ideas of is this, is it going to work? Is this going to work, is this actually good? But you know that doesn't necessarily hold me back of like trying it at least. But I think, yeah, it's just. Is this good enough?

J.R.: 48:52

is always something I'm pondering favorite hot take or something you think most people won't agree with wrestling is real.

JJ: 49:00

Wrestling is 100 real, it is. It's basically a stage play for the masculinity. I like it. It's 100 real. Some of the stories they cut deep because you can. It's. Yeah, it's like watching a movie in real life. I would consider it on the same plane as like watching water world at universal studios. You can't doubt the fact that that person is jumping off that ledge for 50 feet. It's not a magic trick, it's real. Yeah, this is real. They're hitting them off that ledge for 50 feet. It's not a magic trick, it's real. Yeah, this is real. They're hitting them. They're hitting each other, but it's them knowing the knowledge of how to hit them where it's not concussing them, and I think that's so sick yeah, there's a lot more artistry into that.

J.R.: 49:37

Someone put it this way. It's like people think it's not real. It's real, it's scripted, but it's completely real. You, and, like you said, there's an artistry behind it. Yeah, what is one of the best or most worthwhile investments you've ever made in either time? Money, energy, etc.

JJ: 49:52

This is going to sound really cheesy, but I think putting more time into my relationship with my partner partner. I think there was a lot of times where it could have went either or it could have ended faster than what it is still standing at right now, but I think she this is going to be really corny and I apologize. It's all good, lauren will like it.

J.R.: 50:18

At least one person will like it, no, but it's just that it's.

JJ: 50:21

I was in a rock and a hard place between some friends that I had at that time and, like her, and at that time I really was very muddled about what to choose. But it's like now, like fully investing, like my time and my effort to that relationship and nurturing it to her point and to my point as well, of what our certain kind of like ics or like our red flags and our green flags and stuff like that, like nurturing that also. She's like, when I say rest, it's usually just spending time with Lauren and it's definitely of this is my rest, because I know I'm in a safe space and that took a lot of years of building that safe space, but I would say it's at a good point right now where I can literally call her any time of the day and just be like after work or anything like that, and just being like I had a rough day.

JJ: 51:12

Did you have a rough day? Oh, you did. Let's go watch anime. Let's go watch anime and just be together and literally just rest.

J.R.: 51:22

I like it. I think it's an important thing to underscore for people, probably in relationships, right Is? You can't underestimate the value of investing in a relationship, especially if it's one you know that it's the real one, right Is? You won't regret investing more into that because a good relationship will pay you more dividends for what it gives out of your life, right yeah, yeah, shout out to lo, she's the real one. Really shout out. Yeah, if you're listening to this, hopefully you are. Support your man. She.

JJ: 51:46

I think she said she is gonna listen to it as soon as it hops on. So perfect, that one's for you.

J.R.: 51:51

There you go favorite recent purchase in around the 50 to 100 range that has impacted your life the most in the last five months or six months. 50 to 100 range like relatively cheap recently. How recent are we talking about? As recent as you want?

JJ: 52:07

So I would say my standing desk. I would say my standing desk, even though that's not necessarily 50 to $100.

J.R.: 52:13

There's a little bit more.

JJ: 52:15

But I think investment wise is my standing desk, Because I can one have an actual desk, but also two I can recreate the stage of a. Djj, like I've memorized to a point of like how high the table is, so I'll just literally just have it standing, move my chair up and then just start practicing I like it versatile.

J.R.: 52:38

Last question, for rapid fire favorite books, movies, videos, articles, media or anything that you share or recommend the most.

JJ: 52:46

Recommend the most. I have two, because I would say one. I believe everyone should watch a musical, any musical. It could be Wicked, if you want to see how that is actually supposed to be portrayed in, like a stage kind of setting and two solo movies. I'm a big advocate for solo movies. What do you mean by solo movies? Going to the movies, I'm a big advocate for solo movies.

J.R.: 53:05

We mean my solo movies.

JJ: 53:05

Going to the movies by yourself, yeah I'm a big solo movies and just being immersed in that world. Both of it very escapism, but at the same time I would. That's something. I'm a big advocate for solo movies and at least one musical in your lifetime.

J.R.: 53:19

I like it. I mean, I subscribe to that as well. I feel like there's a different experience watching movie by yourself as opposed to with someone else. People like to watch movies together. That's fine, but there's something about watching it and just being in it by yourself and there's no distractions, or how is someone else perceiving me as I watch this movie? It's very meta, but I think I can't underscore that. You should definitely try it. So I agree with that.

JJ: 53:39

Yeah, I think it was funny because I was watching Dune by myself, like Dune 2, like IMAX and everything by myself, and I was just like lost in my own world. And then my mind would just be like I think I see myself in Paul Atreides and I don't know if that's a bad thing, is that?

J.R.: 53:55

me, is that me?

JJ: 53:58

Why do I? Why am I so ugh? But yeah, I also cried by myself watching Spider-Man across the Spider-Verse by myself.

J.R.: 54:03

That's a good movie, and I'm going to full disclosure too, the reason why I like watching movies by myself because on the off chance I do cry and I'm more in it as opposed to if I'm watching with my girlfriend and she will be like did you cry?

J.R.: 54:16

I was like what are you talking about? I'm a man, I don't cry, I, but because someone's there, I won't, and so I'm like I need to do this by myself because I want to really be in this. What makes you cry in a movie? Great question. It's the specific themes of unconditional love, especially between, like, parents and their kids. Love, yeah, love or courage to stand up for what you believe in, despite the world, like pounding on you to say different. It's that sort of like standing on your principles or like a self-sacrifice hero sort of thing. Yeah, I'm just, I'm going to give to the world because that's the right thing to do. Yeah, those things will hit me hard, not romance, but yeah.

JJ: 54:51

Yeah, I'm a big. I believe a majority of the times I've cried is when people just come together for one cause and I'm just like, there you go. Yeah, nice, all right, that is it for Rapid Fire. We'll go into ending questions, so last. Our first one is gratitude, and they keep me grounded. I'm thankful for community, for people to keep me in check and for people to give me the harsh realities of my career, and I'm thankful for music because I can listen to any song and put my own situation in that song and apply it to that Love it.

J.R.: 55:40

Final ask from the audience or final takeaways you would like to have, you would like them to have for the show.

JJ: 55:46

Takeaways. I would like, if something is scaring you and you're scared to try it, I would give yourself three counts of a deep breath and then try it. I would say I think something that holds a lot of us back is the courage to try new things. So, especially with me, because I'm very picky and I'm very picky, in a sense of like, with food too. So it's just take a deep breath and then try that sushi that you've never tried before, and at least you could say you tried it. Right, I like it.

J.R.: 56:23

Cool, all right. Last one when can we find you? If people want to check out what you're up to or reach out or anything like that, where can they find you?

JJ: 56:29

Yeah, so I am on Instagram at underscore Milo. So that's M I L zero, and then two additional underscores. You could also find me on SoundCloud, I believe.

J.R.: 56:46

all the links to all of that will be on my Instagram, so just check out my.

J.R.: 56:47

Instagram and everything will be there. Dope yeah, and we'll link it in the show notes as well as in addition to everything we talked about. Cool, all right, jj. That is the end of the recording. Thank you so much for being here. I really appreciate it. Thank you for having me Nice and I'll do my final sign off so to my audience. Thank you, guys for being here. I really appreciate it. Reminder to always be kind to other people, especially yourself, and reminder that you can always learn something from someone if you take the time to listen. Thanks for being here.