J.R.: [00:00:00] Hello everyone, and welcome back to One Thousand Gurus with me, your host, J.R. Yonocruz. So welcome to season eight of the One Thousand Gurus Show. We are going to start off this season with a bang or more specifically, a very special episode. So usually here on the show, we distill the most powerful insights from people of all walks of life, and this one is special because instead of interviewing a guest, we're diving into an incredible conversation between Jay Shetty and the legendary Tony Robbins from the On Purpose Podcast. So hearing Tony Robbins drop the heaviest gems of wisdom reminded me of when I first got into personal development over a decade ago after I graduated college.

And he was one of my original inspirations, and he's considered to be the goat of most thought leaders, entrepreneurs, business [00:01:00] people, and high achievers of the last few decades. Like he's the one who those successful people listen to in order to level up their own career, business, et cetera, their life.

And I was so inspired when I heard this conversation on the podcast that I wanted to dive deep on this show in order to outline my favorite points and then share it with you all. So I felt like it kind of aligned with the ethos of the show still, even though I'm not interviewing someone live, I'm still distilling nuggets of wisdom from a quote unquote guru and putting on this platform to share with you guys.

This episode hit me differently because Tony tackles something we all experience, and that's the feeling of being stuck. But here's the twist. He reveals that it's not about lacking ability or resources. It's something much simpler and yet harder to face. In this recording, the one that we're doing right now, we're going to explore two game changing frameworks that Tony shares in this conversation.

First [00:02:00] is his approach to decision making that can pull you out of paralysis. And second is the critical distinction between achievement and fulfillment. Why you have massive success and still feel empty inside. And also if you guys notice if you're video, I created a presentation for us to go through, similar to my book summaries that I'll be doing and the one that I did on personal finance.

Just to follow along. I'll link this gamma presentation in the show description so you guys can take a look. It's basically just an outline of visual guide for me as I go through and read out my points to you guys for this episode. So without further ado, hope you enjoy this special One Thousand Gurus episode, breaking Down my favorite ideas and takeaways from Tony Robbins's, conversation from On Purpose with Jay Shetty.

All right, so let's start off.

All right, so let's start off the power of decision making. So why do so many of us feel stuck?

Tony makes this powerful statement early in the conversation. He says that [00:03:00] people who feel stuck emotionally, spiritually aren't stuck because they lack ability. They're stuck because of delayed or avoiding decisions. So think about that for a second. How many areas of your life do you feel stagnant right now because you haven't actually made a decision if you are.

Trying to gather more information, waiting for the perfect moment or hoping circumstances will change just on their own.

A good example of this is my friend they have two music subscriptions, one to Amazon Music and one to Spotify, and they can't make a decision on which they like more because of the UI or the library or whatever.

I've never had paid memberships to either of them, but because they were unable to decide which music service they wanted to keep the subscription for their indecision made them keep both memberships. And so they've been paying for two music subscriptions, a redundant subscription for several months now. Literally indecision is costing this person money. And I think that's a very clear example of how [00:04:00] waiting or hoping that circumstances will change is keeping you stuck.

So here's what Tony emphasizes. It's not the conditions, but the decisions that determine life quality. So decisions, your conditions, where you were born, what resources you have, what's happened to you.

Those of course matter. But they don't determine your outcome, your decisions do. And he backs this up with his own life story of transforming his difficult conditions through decisive action.

And here's where it gets really interesting. Tony says, and I quote, not deciding is the worst decision, which I think is really good to sit on and really digest because sometimes we're so scared to make a decision that we end up not making a decision, but we don't realize that that indecision is actually making a decision.

So why? Your brain doesn't do well with uncertainty. We have a fundamental human need for certainty, of course, and when you're living on the fence, unable to commit to a direction, that uncertainty creates massive stress and it drains your energy and it keeps you in limbo.

[00:05:00] So how do we actually make better decisions? Tony Robbins breaks it down into this sort of six part framework.

So part one, decide on an outcome or goal, what you actually want. Get clear on the desired outcome. This isn't just about choosing what you want, it's about having absolute clarity on where you're headed, right? Because you have to know where you wanna go, but it doesn't necessarily mean like you know exactly how to get there. You just need to decide on al outcome or goal.

Part two, commit to it with energy. A decision without commitment is just a wish. Tony says that you have to commit the energy to achieve it. This is where most people fail. They make a choice, but they don't dedicate the resources like the time, energy, focus to actually make it happen.

It's kind of like the last time you heard someone say they wanted to get in shape for example. But they don't get a gym membership. They don't schedule their workouts in their calendar. They don't pay for a trainer if they need one. If they don't know how to work out, they don't subscribe to a meal [00:06:00] plan. Or they don't buy protein. Or they don't like they don't invest the time and energy, the resources and put it in their calendar and pay towards the goal that they want. They just say they wanna get fit. And so that's the difference between committing to it with energy and just paying it lip service.

Part three is resolve to see it through. So I like his definition of this. But resolution is that determination to persist no matter what obstacles arise. It's the difference between I'll try and I will.

Part four, write down your options with their upsides and downsides. So get it out of your head and onto paper. Evaluate the real consequences, not just imagine fears. A lot of times what keeps us stuck is this imaginary fear that looms over us, but when we actually break down the pros, the cons, the consequences, the fears, and what actually could happen, we realize that our fears are a lot bigger in our mind than in actuality when we write it down. This is a very powerful exercise.

Part five, take immediate action. Here's the key. The fastest way to certainty [00:07:00] is to make decisions and act on them. You'll discover what's real through action, not through endless analysis. Basically, just do it.

Part six. You start with small decisions to build momentum. Tony compares decision making to a muscle. You don't start by lifting the heaviest weight, making the biggest decisions. You build up to it. Start with small, low stakes decisions. What route to take to work, what to eat, what to tackle first today, and then build that decision making muscle and then tackle the bigger choices.

One thing Tony emphasizes is that decision making isn't a one step process. It's trial and error. You make a decision, take action, gather feedback, and then adjust. Tony has this great line. The smartest people are usually terrible investors. The smartest people want to know everything before they decide. Just food for thought. Analysis, paralysis is real and it's killing your momentum.

One more thing before we move on. Tony says that most people are stressed because stress is measured by how much you feel you control versus how much you feel events control you.

So when you're not [00:08:00] making decisions, you feel like life is happening to you, like you're very reactive. But when you start making clear decisions and taking action and being proactive, you feel like you are happening to life rather than life happening to you. And that shift in control is key.

So we've talked a lot about the power of making decisions, but the next question is, once you start achieving things through better decision making, does that automatically lead to happiness?

Tony would say, Absolutely not.

And that brings us to our second major theme. Achievement versus fulfillment. So the science of achievement specifically versus the art of fulfillment. So this might be the most important distinction that Tony makes in the entire conversation.

He breaks down two fundamental skills that everyone needs to master the science of achievement and the art of fulfillment. And here's a critical insight. Most people in western culture are only focused on one of these.

Can you guess which one?

So the science of achievement is about following systematic patterns and [00:09:00] strategies that lead to success. It's called a science because it can be studied and replicated. You want to build wealth. There are proven financial patterns. Follow them and you'll likely build wealth. You want to get in shape.

Same thing. There are proven principles of nutrition and exercise. You apply them consistently and your body will respond. You wanna build a business, study how successful businesses operate, follow those patterns and you'll increase your odds dramatically.

Tony says, your body is a science. Every one of us is slightly different, but there are certain patterns that if you violate them, you're going to have illness, disease, et cetera. But if you apply them, you're going to have a high level of energy and health. So the skill achievement is what most human beings in Western culture are pursuing. We're a consumer culture and we're taught to get more, achieve more, accomplish more.

So the art of fulfillment. Here's the problem. Tony says that the second skill is more important, yet it is not promoted in Western culture very much. Unlike achievement, fulfillment, is personal and very subjective.

It can't be copied from someone else. You have to discover [00:10:00] what personally fulfills you. And here's a strategy that Tony describes. Success without fulfillment is the ultimate failure. This is a quote I heard from him probably over 10 years ago, and it really stuck with me.

Success without fulfillment is the ultimate failure. So you can go on and achieve everything that you wanna achieve and be quote unquote successful. But if you're not fulfilled, you're actually a failure. He references Robin Williams as an example, someone who achieved everything by external standards, but was deeply unfulfilled. The world saw success, but then he felt empty.

Jay Shady makes this observation during the conversation. He says, I think today what people are getting confused is that they think if they're more fulfilled, they'll be better at the science. And Tony responds that you won't stay fulfilled either, because their idea of fulfillment is what feels good in the moment, but what feels good in the moment is not what feels good long term.

So it's this idea that you think fulfillment is this thing that is [00:11:00] actually short term. But in reality, your short term gratification is way different from your long term fulfillments. Those are usually opposite things, right? For example, eating that let's say hamburger is very gratifying and fulfilling in the short term.

But in the long term, it is not good for your health. It is detrimental to your long-term health. And so that's like the dichotomy that happens in everything. Even personal finance, right? You can buy the thing now and feel good, or you can save and invest it for a greater return in the future.

So what does feel good in the long term? What creates fulfillment? Tony says growth. He says, when you grow, you feel alive. Also, one of the more famous Tony Robbins quotes probably is attributed to someone else. But he says, if you're green, you're growing. If you're ripe, you're rotting. So there's only two ways. It's you're like, your life is either expanding and growing, or it's shrinking and dying.

He follows us up with a powerful framework. The two things that make us feel alive is growing [00:12:00] and giving. So the whole point is to grow so that you have something to give. Growth and contribution. That's the formula for fulfillment, growth plus contribution.

Here's one of Tony Robbins most famous quotes, and he repeats it in the conversation. Progress equals happiness.

So people ask him all the time, what makes people happy? You've worked with millions of people around the world. What's the common key to happiness? And his answer is always progress. When you're making progress, you're happy even when you haven't achieved the goal yet, even when things are hard. If you're moving forward and you're growing and you're developing, you feel alive. And I think that's the most important thing. It's not the achievement itself, it's the progression towards that that makes you feel alive.

But achievement alone, that can leave you asking, is that all there is?

So here's the key insight you need to master both skills, like we said in the beginning of this section. Master the science of achievement so that you can create the life that you want financially, physically, relationally, et cetera. But you also have to master the art [00:13:00] of fulfillments by discovering what allows you to grow and what allows you to give.

Because you have to become your best self and that can only come from the pursuit of growth. And once you become your best self, the whole point is to give. You can't just grow for the sake of growing. Giving is the other side of the coin.

So Tony says, more stress comes because you're not fulfilled. It's not because you're not achieving, it's because you're not making progress on what matters to you.

It's kind of like what we talked about in previous episodes where you get stressed out when you're not feeling fulfilled, even though you are achieving something. You can be crushing it at work, hitting every goal, making great money, and still be stressed and unhappy if that work isn't connecting to something meaningful or a deeper purpose. And if it's not helping you grow and if it's not contributing or helping something beyond yourself.

So Tony shares this funny story about Steve Wynn, who built half of Las Vegas, and he bought an $87 million painting. And Tony was like joking around with him [00:14:00] saying like, oh, let's see what an $87 million painting is.

And it was basically like a red box with paint. And he's like, yo, give me a hundred bucks and a can of paint and I'll paint you the same thing, in jest. Right? And Steve Wynn is a huge philanthropist and he knows the value of money. But the whole point of the story was to give perspective, like to Steve Wynn, this painting, the meaning behind it, the context gave him fulfillment. And that fulfillment meant it was worth the $87 million that he had because he saw the value, whereas someone like Tony did not, because it didn't mean the same thing to him. So fulfillment is very personal.

What fulfills your neighbor might not fulfill you. Your job is to discover what lights you up, what helps you grow, and what gives your life meaning.

So Tony warns, if you're doing it for higher purpose, more than just money, you're going to work your ass off and then be fulfilled.

But if money's the only reason why you're doing it, you're gonna stress out and burn out. Money does matter, of course, and making it is a skill. It allows you to take [00:15:00] care of your family. But if it's your only motivation, eventually you'll burn out. That candle will burn out.

He says stress comes from making things more important than they really are. Failure comes from making things less important than they really are. And it's an art, finding the balance between achievement and fulfillment.

I like that last quote though, because it makes sense. If you, let's say, make work more important than it really is, you're going to get stressed out. But if you make things that are actually important, like your family and your health, et cetera, less important than they really are, that's what creates failure.

So those are the two major frameworks from this conversation. Now let's look at some of Tony Robbins' most powerful quotes from this episode, and it's the kind of wisdom that sticks with you long after the episode or the conversation ends. I think for me, like quotes can sometimes be more sticky than long conversations or like how you feel about them.

And I think that's why I wanted to end this [00:16:00] recording with my top favorite Tony Robbins quotes.

So the first one is progress equals happiness. It's simple and profound. It's not the destination, it's the journey of growth that brings joy.

Not deciding is the worst decision. Your indecision is actually a decision, and it's usually the worst one you can make.

What feels good in the moment is not what feels good long term. Short term comfort versus long term fulfillment. Choose wisely. Of course, there's always a time and space for a short term. But just know that there's consequences with that resource allocation, et cetera.

Stress comes from making things more important than they really are. Failure comes from making things less important than they really are. Something that we already covered. Perspective is everything. Are you catastrophizing? Are you minimizing something that actually matters?

Most people are stressed because stress is measured by how much you feel you control events versus events control you. The locus of control. Do you feel like life is happening to you or are you actively shaping your life?

Success without [00:17:00] fulfillment is the ultimate failure. Again, one of my favorite quotes. You can have it all and still feel empty. Achievement alone is not enough.

It is not the conditions, but the decisions that determine life quality. Your circumstances are your starting point, but not your ending point. Your decisions determine where you go from here.

When you grow, you feel alive. Growth is the antidote to feeling stuck, bored, or hopeless. If you're feeling stuck, usually the answer is to find something that you can focus on that will allow you to grow.

The smartest people want to know everything before they decide. The smartest people are usually terrible investors. Overthinking kills momentum. Action creates clarity.

All right, so last section, practical takeaways. So let's bring this home. What can you actually do with these insights? Here are some practical takeaways.

In the spirit of One Thousand gurus, I always wanna leave you guys with something you can take away, something actionable.

Take away number one, build decision making confidence with small daily choices. So don't wait for the big decision to practice. Start with small choices. [00:18:00] Which task will you do first? What will we have for lunch? Build that muscle.

Takeaway number two, develop personal value statements to guide major decisions. Get clear on what matters to you. Write it down. Use it as a compass when you're facing tough choices. Does this align with who I want to be?

Take away. Number three, focus on progress, not perfection. You don't need to have it all figured out. You just need to be moving forward. Progress even slow creates happiness.

Take away. Number four, prioritize growth and contribution over mere achievements. Ask yourself, what am I doing now that's helping me grow? How am I giving back? These are the keys to fulfillment that we should be focusing on.

Take away number five, take immediate action on decisions to prevent living in uncertainty. Once you've made a decision, act on it quickly. The longer you wait, the more doubt creeps in. Action creates certainty. And finally, take away. Number six, align your goals with personal values for true fulfillment.

Achievement is hollow if it's not connected to something meaningful to [00:19:00] you. Make sure that what you're chasing actually matters to you, not just to society or your parents or your peers, something that actually means something to you.

That's what I'm taking away from this great conversation with Tony Robbins and Jay Shetty on On Purpose. So I will link that episode obviously in the description below.

If you're feeling stuck right now, I hope this episode gave you some clarity.

I know I'm gonna listen to it and look through my notes again, just as a, maybe a quarterly reminder. Remember that it's not about lacking ability, it's about making decisions. It's not just about achieving, it's also about finding what fulfills you. Mastering the science of achievements, the art of fulfillment, building your decision making muscle, focusing on progress and growing so you have something to give.

Thanks again for listening to One Thousand Gurus. If this resonated with you, please share it with someone who you think needs to hear it. If you found this valuable, please like, follow, subscribe, leave five stars and whatever platform you're listening to this to. It really helps with discoverability of the show.

Reminder to always be kind to other people, [00:20:00] especially yourself, and remember that you can always learn something from someone if you take the time to listen. Thank you guys for being here.