J.R.: [00:00:00] Hello everyone, and welcome back to One Thousand Gurus, where we share the stories and lessons from people of all walks of life. I am your host, J.R. Yonocruz.

Today's guest is a return guest, Blessie Marie Panopio.

She's a dancer, competitive singer, and content creator. She enjoys karaoke in her spare time, dancing K-pop covers, and is a punthusiast.

So this was another really fun and chill episode with the one and only Blessie. It's always such a somewhat strange experience talking to her on the podcast because we see each other, like, every other day, and we talk every day.

So it almost feels a bit forced trying to interview her and ask questions I generally already know the answer to, which is a fantastic thing if you're in a relationship, but it makes a podcast interview a little bit difficult.

But regardless, this was a lot of fun, and I enjoyed giving her the space to share her life updates since the last recording, including her fitness and nutrition journey, her mom's recent health scare, the importance of sleep, her getting back into reading, and then some random topics like the shortened length of modern songs, the discussions over goats, and [00:01:00] a bit of loss and grief.

It was a very fun and casual episode, and hopefully you guys enjoy it as well.

So without further ado, please enjoy this episode with Blessie Marie Panopio.

 Hello, and welcome back to One Thousand Gurus. Blessie, welcome to the show, or welcome back. 

Blessie: Yay. Thank you for having me again. 

J.R.: Nice. 

Thank you for being back. Your last recording, which was season two, I believe, was November 15, 2024. So it's like a year and a half, right? 

Do you have any life updates since the last recording a year and a half ago?

Yes. 

Blessie: Any 

J.R.: TLDRs? 

Blessie: Um, TLDRs is we moved to a new place, me and my mom. Um, Finding a new place is like, extremely tiring and mentally taxing um, and financially. Um, But yeah. Um, That and then uh, from last year, I think I only did one dance cover per [00:02:00] month with SHERO a little bit less this year too. And I also have been reading a lot of books, and more lately I've been back to the gym.

Nice. So yeah. That's been fun. Getting gains and stuff. 

J.R.: Wow, so much gains. What kind of gains? 

Blessie: Um, Gaining less calories. I don't know. 

J.R.: That makes sense. Gains. That math checks out. Be sure to send that math to Jae. 

Blessie: Yep. Um, Insight, gaining discipline, that stuff. 

J.R.: Mm. Yeah. Cool. You also mentioned in the form your mom's health scare.

Blessie: Yes. Um, She um, had been having a hard time breathing for like a few days before she was rushed to the ER. I had to call 911, and them had been to get her to the ER, and then she was h- admitted to the hospital for like a few days. Um, Ba- basically her heart was v- very [00:03:00] weak.

Not even conclusive either with what caused it. I think it's mainly because of her diabetes and high blood pressure. So yeah. That was really scary. But she's better now. She's obviously not at the hospital anymore. She can walk for a mile barely, well, or not really, like out of breath anymore.

But in the beginning she was like really like even s- simple things like walking, it was just like tough for her. So yeah. And with that- Mm ... it's it's it's one of those where it's like, "Oh, you know, she's not getting any younger. I need to spend more time with her," kind of thing. Um, It kind of sucks, but also it's like it's just life in general because as um, like an early 30s girl you kind of wanna be like selfish a lot, but like when you're living with family, it's hard.

And yeah. So that's what I've been trying to do is, is like [00:04:00] getting her to places, 'cause she's mostly a homebody, which she doesn't, yeah, she doesn't really go out and get to explore even California, even though she wants to travel. But yeah. I'm just trying to get her to see more of the world. Sort of.

J.R.: Hmm. 

Blessie: Yeah. 

J.R.: So then what, what helped her recover from, you said the difficulty breathing? What changed? 

Blessie: Oh her medica- her new medications, I would say. A lot of rest. Um- Yeah, it's just m- new maintenance medications these days and low sodium diet, which is kind of hard when you have a palate of a Filipino.

Our- Mm-hmm ... our cuisine isn't exactly low sodium, so. 

J.R.: Like the cardiologist couldn't identify what exactly caused it um, b- based on what we had told him.

Blessie: But the general idea [00:05:00] is because she has diabetes and high blood pressure, sometimes for high blood pressure medication

so like over time maybe that's what caused the heart being weaker. And actually, also, I re- I learned this recently, but a little bit of family history is there, there have been heart problems within both sides of my fam- like Mom and Dad's side, so I'm kinda cooked.

So that's why I need to take care of my health so that doesn't happen. Mm-hmm. Yeah. 

J.R.: Gotcha. 

And then you're, you guys are walking more often, and then you're going to the, you're going to the gym more often, so that's good.

Blessie: Yes. Yes. And what kind of pushed me was mainly because my clothes started to get tighter um, which I'm like, "Hmm, I don't really wanna buy new clothes." Clothes. Yes. 

J.R.: Yeah, yeah. Mm. 

Blessie: Yes. And so yeah, that was the main thing. 

J.R.: You could just make every- you could just make everything cropped and sleeveless, and then you're fine.

Blessie: But aesthetically I d- I wasn't [00:06:00] liking that too. I wasn't liking what I was seeing in the mirror. So, so that's usually what, you know, pushes people to get back into to the gym, I guess. And also being surrounded by, with my team, they're kind of like very skinny. And also like, even not just them, like K-pop idols in general, it's just like they're the ones that I see.

And so it's like I kind of, I've been wanting that anyway, so it's like, the thing is I hadn't in the past, like really worked on it. It was just like, "Oh, I want that." But I didn't really do anything about it. But yeah. So- Mm-hmm ... I was like it's time to start." And I don't even have results to show for it, like as much.

I just, the only thing is, you know, the weight. I had lost a- almost like 9, 10 pounds since February when I started. So that's mainly it as far as like physically showing results. I don't have that [00:07:00] yet. 

J.R.: we'll, we'll get into that in a bit, but I mean, losing almost 10 pounds at your weight, I was doing the calculations, I'm like, that's 10% of your body weight or something like that.

So I'm like, that's a non-significant amount, so like that's pretty good. Because for someone who's, let's say 200 pounds, and then trying to lose 10% of that is significantly more so, um, you know, that's, that's definitely not insignificant.

I was gonna say, I was thinking about this at the gym today too, of like motivation and like what motivates people is always des- well, desire, but also unhappiness.

Because happiness is, does not motivate you. It's unhappiness that motivates you. And so I was thinking about that as I always ponder about motivations and changing people's habits and behaviors, is that when people get to a state of being comfortable, then they're not gonna change, 'cause why would they need to?

But if you wanted someone to change, you need to point out their pain points or show [00:08:00] them something that they're unhappy with. So basically, that's why all, on, all marketing is just geared towards showing you or selling you on the idea that you are unhappy, and therefore you should take action and buy this product to be happy.

Blessie: Mm-hmm. 

J.R.: Yeah. That's so true. My random gym thoughts. Yeah. 

Blessie: No, but I heard w- from a priest a few months ago. His sermon contained, Or he talked about the importance of pain and how- it's the one that's, that pushes people for better hopefully. 'Cause without pain you're just gonna stay wherever you are.

So that's also like, a way to like, think. When you are in pain like, it it kind of soothes you like, um, comforts you to think that like, oh, th- this is not just to hurt myself, you know? The pain is for me to go somewhere else and not just that state.

[00:09:00] Definitely.

Wait for nutrition, have you tried eating less Filipino food and more Chinese food?

'Cause maybe that would- Is that, 

you know, you're onto- Yeah ... something. 

J.R.: Mm-hmm. 

Blessie: No, but like actually though, Chinese- You get 

J.R.: Filipino results versus Chinese results? 

Blessie: Chinese food has a lot of veggies, right? So I would say I have not tried it yet, but maybe I could. 

J.R.: Have you tried eating broccoli? Because broccoli, you are what you eat.

Blessie: Because that's how broccolis are. 

J.R.: Yes. You are what you eat, so if 

Blessie: you eat broccoli- And I'll just have a 

J.R.: a bit of hair ... eat broccoli in hourglasses, yes. 

Blessie: Mm. You're onto something. No, I have not. Yeah. 

J.R.: But you don't like broccoli, so that I guess doesn't really matter.

Blessie: I do not. Oh, but like- See? ... 

You would give it to me, I know. You would give it to me and then I'd have to eat it, and then, yeah. 

J.R.: But broccoli is good for you.

Blessie: But it's for my... I know. It's for my benefit, right? 

J.R.: It's like, "Oh, no, you forced me to have more money." It's like, "Oh, I'm sorry." Like, it's good for you. Usually [00:10:00] people want good health.

Blessie: Yes. Yeah. The veggies are important. So yeah, diet wise, is that what we're trying to get into? Diet wise it's just- less of what I'm eating is the main thing. Yeah. 'Cause like I mentioned to you before, right? I didn't wanna hate eating which it was a good start to the fitness journey. Like I w- it's not like a strict like chicken and broccoli whatever diet.

J.R.: Yeah, 

Blessie: yeah.

J.R.: So portioning. 'Cause that's what, that's what K-pop idols eat. If you wanted to look like a K-pop idol, you have to eat chicken and broccoli. 

Blessie: Yeah. Oh, right. Right. No, actually though- If you wanna eat- ... I think Bini also 

J.R.: had that diet ... if you wanna be Chinese, you gotta eat Chine- well, see, there you go.

Bini has a K-pop diet. 

Blessie: They did. They were sharing crackers at one point. 

J.R.: See? See that? 

Blessie: Because that's all 

J.R.: they had to eat. They ate one cracker between all of them, between the whole group, one cracker. That's their diet. 

Blessie: Actually. They were... they told that story. But yeah, [00:11:00] so portioning really helped.

I, like, it was the first time that I counted calories, which was a lot. It felt like work, a lot of work in the beginning, but once you start, you know, it gets easier over time. It's one of those things. So yeah, that's been what's helping me with my diet and- Yeah ... my coach again. 

J.R.: 'Cause it's just a habit, right?

Like, it's always- 

... 

J.R.: New behaviors, new habits are always difficult in the beginning- Yeah ... but once it becomes a habit, it's not that bad. 

Blessie: Mm-hmm. 

J.R.: Okay, so well, I wanted to go back to why it started or how it started, how has it been, biggest challenges, and any breakthroughs or mental unlocks or shifts that made a difference.

Blessie: Challenges, I think- On the beginning when I would struggle, like logging my meals, like sometimes I would just miss and then I forget.

But then it helps when we set like those day, like those check-in days, so I don't really fall off and then just forget everything, you [00:12:00] know? So those check-in days help also. Challenges with working out, I think at the beginning, like anything I was kind of intimidated by working out on my own.

I think in the beginning I was just like, I always wanted to like stick with you especially because, you know, I didn't have a gym membership yet. And so like I would wanna do your workouts with you. But it's like you already gave me... It's like dancing. You already gave me the vocabulary, I just needed to apply it- Mm-hmm

on my own, on my own time. So I think going frequently in the beginning with you helped me go by my... When I was able to go by myself. So, so yeah, that helped. Any other challenges? I think, like actually this morning my mom cooked my favorite corned beef brand Deli Mondo. Shout out. Don't... You wanna sponsor me?

Just kidding. And it was really good and I only portioned my rice, right, like the [00:13:00] three ounce or whatever and I, in my mind I was like, I can definitely eat more." There's so much ulam, there's so much corned beef still. But knowing that that was my, that was all I needed, like it was just a kind of a mind over everything kind of thing.

Like I was able to stop myself and be like, "Okay, I don't need to eat more," even though my mouth was like, "I want more." So yeah, just I've built that discipline I guess from over time. Mm-hmm. That way. So 

J.R.: like more self con- more self-control. Yeah. Knowing that like- And 

Blessie: awareness. 

J.R.: Awareness, yeah.

Because before, I think we all get into that where we kind of just follow with our mouth. Oh yeah, our mouth wants more of this intense flavor of sweet or savory or whatever it is, and then so be- if we don't have a goal or a reason in mind, we just eat until we don't wanna eat anymore, which is not really a good recipe for fitness or nutrition or weight loss, right?

You kind of have to be more aware and strict, [00:14:00] or if you have a goal in mind, knowing what that goal is and how to achieve it. So you mentioned accountability helped you. You mentioned kind of that mental block of going to work out by yourself, and then now like having more self-awareness and self-control when it comes to eating and knowing that like you're not actually starving.

You know how much- For sure ... you actually need to eat, and then the logging and weighing of your food gives you more awareness of what you actually need and you're not being like restricted a lot You know? Like you definitely are still able to eat, which is good. 

Blessie: Yeah. 

J.R.: I was gonna ask what is your workout, like how do you approach the actual routine, like the working out?

What do you do? 

Blessie: I just try, as you mentioned, to hit every muscle. Try. Keyword try. So yeah, not just... 'Cause before, because I want abs, that was the goal that I told you, right? I would just do abs. Like literally in the beginning I was doing like 45-minute, hour ab workouts, straight abs. But yeah, for to keep it balanced, [00:15:00] yeah I would do like arms, back legs.

Yeah. The main stuff. And then also I just end with cardio, as you mentioned, because our bodies would tend to get t- tired if we start with cardio. So I thought, yeah, that's a good point. So that's what I've been doing. 

J.R.: Nice. I have a feeling like if you keep that up, like you do, you hit cardio at the end of your workouts, you're gonna see a lot of really, like you're gonna see a lot of results, if you just give it four to six more weeks, 'cause I feel like that's such a big unlock.

Like to finish your workout, you're done, and then you end it with cardio, you just empty the gas tank. A- as long as you don't overeat, that's like a recipe for success for how you're trying to, like your goals, right? 

Blessie: Yeah. 

J.R.: So that's 

Blessie: awesome. Oh, I wanted to add to a challenge is like when you're eating out, although, like I do now feel the my, with my body, knowing my body now, it's like I know when I'm about to get full and I cannot take [00:16:00] anymore.

Like even at buffets, I actually can't. Like I'm losing money if I go to buffets. It's not worth it- Mm-hmm ... for me anymore. But I just u- I try to lessen the carbs. That's mainly the strategy. 

J.R.: Have you ever thought about when you're eating out not to hide your water and just drink water while you eat?

So for those of you who don't know, when, if you ever eat at a restaurant with Blessie, she'll take her water cup and put it at the end of the table like it's a f- like it's someone you're trying to ignore and not pay attention to. And I went like, "Why are you, why are you hiding your water behind the sauce dishes or something like that?"

Um, I, I still- Yeah ... don't even, we've been dating for almost seven years. I still don't know why you don't drink water while you eat, because that's an unlock for not only feeling more full, being more hydrated, and eating less calories, and it's just good for you, so. 

Blessie: I think that was why, it's because I would feel full.

But n- that wasn't my goal in the beginning. In the past, I would just eat to eat, you know? [00:17:00] And then now that I do have a fitness goal, okay, maybe I should drink in while I... 

J.R.: Maybe I should talk to this water cup instead of ignoring him across the table. I mean, not, don't make eye contact with my water.

Blessie: It's like that's the structure of me eating. It's just if I drink water, that's it. Good. 

J.R.: No, you're gonna feel full. But it's- That's... How terrible. Wow 

Blessie: So yeah, that's why I push my water all the way. Also, it's like I'm not using it, so it's like- 

J.R.: Yeah. Well, that's why I was, that's why I was asking, 'cause it's like we ate recently, and you're, you were still hiding your water, and I'm like, "Hmm, I thought, thought, well, I thought we decided water is a good thing, especially while eating."

Blessie: I, I didn't put two and two together yet, but now that you pointed it out, you're right. 

J.R.: Okay. 

Blessie: My- 

J.R.: There you go ... 

Blessie: my thought is different now. 

J.R.: Just in coach strategy mode, I guess, 'cause like- 

Blessie: Yeah ... 

J.R.: hmm, strange. But uh, anyways, that's cool. Happy to hear that it seems like you're having a lot of different breakthroughs.

Mm-hmm. Uh, [00:18:00] You... I feel like you're definitely one of my most successful clients so far, Out of? ... which is kind of funny. Out of we won't mention of out of how many, but I will say you are the star client s- for sure. Okay. Just based on, just based on your habits and how you've been approaching it, and your consistent progress, and I think the mindset and behavior shift is the biggest thing.

Because as long as you keep those two things up for the long term, you'll be fine. There's nothing to worry about. 

Blessie: Yeah. And I enjoy going to the gym now compared to, like, all the way before. 

J.R.: Who are you? It's like- So strange ... You're 

Blessie: a different person. Back in college days, I, we would j- my friends and I would just go take a photo then to show that we went to the gym, and then forget about it.

You're 

J.R.: one of, one of those people. 

Blessie: I was. Wow. I was, yeah. 

J.R.: Liars. Ugh, disgusting. Disgusting. 

Blessie: It's because- Those fitness influencers ... and I think that's because at the time I, there was nothing for me to lose. I w- I wasn't gaining that much weight that I didn't feel insecure about. 

J.R.: So you just wanted the [00:19:00] social media clout.

You just wanted the clout. 

Blessie: Oh, yeah. I think that was it. Interesting. College Blessie. 

J.R.: Yeah. Okay, anything, any other lessons or insights that you wanna pass along that we haven't covered that you think would be helpful for anyone else, earlier Blessie or someone else who also is in the same boat, where they look at themselves and they think, "Oh, you know, maybe I want, I wanna make more pr- I'm a little bit unhappy here.

I wanna make some progress. I wanna make some changes and feel better about myself physically"? Any lessons or advice you would give to them? 

Blessie: As far as like building habits it really does help having someone make you accountable for it. So for those people who have a hard time with that, maybe just have your friends or someone you care about or trust, whatever to keep you accountable, 'cause it really helps. 'Cause it's really hard to keep it going, keeping that momentum going, and staying focused on your goal, especially when life throws you curve balls and then you just [00:20:00] fall off, 'cause that happens to me a lot.

J.R.: All right. I wanna pivot to, you mentioned the importance of sleep.

Do you care to elaborate and/or what have you learned or implemented about sleep? 

Blessie: Yes. 

Um, lately I've been using some sort of white noise. 

J.R.: Caucasian noise? 

Blessie: You knew it. 

J.R.: Not Asian noise? 

Blessie: No. 

J.R.: Chinese noise? 

Blessie: You would. No, but like I, I use this app called, it's a self-care app called Finch where you take care of this little pet bird.

But anyway, one of the features on the app is like sounds just for if you wanna be productive, that's kind of just like the noise that you set for 10 or 30 minutes. But yeah, that's what I've been using to fall asleep, so that, that helps out a lot when I can't sleep. And like over time, like obviously getting more sleep, I feel more [00:21:00] energized.

So it really helps you in the long run. And I know you read a book about sleep and the importance of it, too. Check out marloyonocruz.com. 

J.R.: Mm. 

Blessie: Oh, 

J.R.: yeah. Why We, Why We 

Blessie: Sleep- 

J.R.: So I think you can- ... by Matthew Walker. Yeah. 

Blessie: Yeah. It's good. You can elaborate on that even better probably. 

J.R.: Yeah. I mean, basically it's just- Yeah

the f- the literal foundation of all your health is just sleep. More than working out, more than supplements, more than nutrition, it's sleep. If your sleep is crap, there's no point in doing anything else. You have to fix your sleep first off, and that... 'cause sleep is what helps you recover.

What, it's what boosts your immune system. It's what helps you do everything. Just re- like rest, recover, rejuvenate. It's the other half of being awake, and our bodies were designed to sleep. And so anything that you do that detracts from sleep, like drinking alcohol late. You can drink alcohol, just do it early in the morning or early afternoon.

But don't do it at night when it, well, right when you sleep because it'll mess up your [00:22:00] sleep. Same thing with caffeine, which is something that I hypocritically do anyways, 'cause the other night I drank caffeine at 8:00 PM, and so that screwed up my sleep. But I knew I was doing it. 

Blessie: You're aware. 

J.R.: And I know it's bad.

I'm very aware. But if you do that, then like you were mentioning, it screws up everything else. Your energy is trash. Your mood is trash. Your hunger levels go up when you're sleep deprived. You tend to have less willpower and self-control, and your hunger, satiety hormones are thrown out of whack.

So I always notice that I'm usually hungrier when I'm sleep deprived, and I have less self-control, et cetera, et cetera. So it's just a cascading spiral of negative effects. And so the number one thing you should always do is focus on sleep. Yeah ... you'll live longer. That's right. But yeah, so... Well, I just answered your question for you.

I was trying to get your insights, but I guess you- I feel like- ... you effectively delegated. 

Blessie: I did. It's because you have better, I don't know, insights or explanation on the matter anyway, so. 

J.R.: Are you flirting with me? Yes. Because I have a [00:23:00] girlfriend, so 

Blessie: stop that. Oh, no. Where is she, though? 

J.R.: Anyways, okay, so while we're talking about books, you mentioned you're getting back into reading, and then you're reading your- 

Blessie: Yes

J.R.: favorite series that you used to read as a k- as, Well, you said reading as an adult, so I don't know if that implied younger adult you used to read or as a kid or somewhere in between. But, I think I was- What... Yeah why'd you get back to reading? What got you back into reading? And then do you wanna just do a rapid fire list off of some series?

Blessie: Yeah, I think I was referring to a couple things like, yeah, The Hunger Games, and also there's this comic books that I used to read back in the day in the Philippines called W.I.T.C.H. But I'm rereading that now, so- Is it Tagalog? Is it- ... it feels nostalgic. It's, it stands for the names- W.I.T.C.H.

of the five med- five magical girls, Wi- Wil, Irma, Taranee, Cornelia, Haylin. Anyway it's just like a fantasy adventure-type storyline, which I realize now, even though I say it all the time that I [00:24:00] love it, I don't remember the plot. So thankfully someone uploaded it, and then I'm able to read it again.

So that's one of them. I had been reading or listening to audiobooks over the past few years. You- back in the day it was, like, with Audible, but I didn't wanna pay for the credits anymore. And then I found out that Spotify had free books, audiobooks, but also that one is limited. You can only listen, for the premium subscription it's 15 hours or something per month.

So I was a little bit limited on that. And then I heard that when you have a library card, you can just download a couple apps, and then you can get a bunch of books for free- Mm-hmm ... which makes sense. You know, they're libraries. So yeah, it was actually really exciting for me to get a library card this year.

So I listen on Hoopla. So, so yeah, that... It's been pretty easy to borrow books. I think you can borrow up to four or five books. I don't remember. But- Mm-hmm ... yeah. Like audiobooks. Yeah, audiobooks. [00:25:00] And- Oh, that's cool ... physical, like ebooks too. I think you can download ebooks as well. Even movies- Ah

and music those are available through the app. And other than that library cards can get you access to obviously the libraries and equipment. You can check them out. Mm-hmm ... and the main thing that I love about it is I can print for free. 

J.R.: Oh. 

Blessie: I don't have a printer, so, so I really...

It's pretty exciting for me. 

J.R.: Wait, which library card do you have? 

Blessie: Through the Bellflower LA County Library basically Bellflower? Oh, it says, 

J.R.: i- is it based off of the library you can get? Is it based off your your resident, your city? 

Blessie: I think so, but I've heard of other people just sort of collecting library cards so they can get- 

J.R.: Right

Blessie: but I don't know how- That's- ... true that 

J.R.: is. Yeah, I don't know how that works. That's what I was wondering, 'cause I'm like, "Hmm, I know you mentioned that." And I'm like, "Maybe I should get a library card too, just to have, if, especially if it's free." Yeah. For the printing and then maybe I can check out books.

But, like, I, I exclusively do [00:26:00] audiobooks, as you know, and- 

Blessie: Mm-hmm ... 

J.R.: maybe my readers do on in Audible and whatnot. Not that I need more content to consume- Right ... because as a, as an avid Crunchyroll and YouTube Premium and Audible and podca- I have too much stuff I need to listen to. I feel like if my phone is not on playing something, my brain starts to short-circuit.

I'm like, "Wait, I need... I have so much stuff I need to listen to." And so I'm always multitasking, which I don't know if that's a good thing. But I just have no lack of media that I have to consume, and so I don't know where- There's so much ... my thought is growing of why I need a library card. But it sounds like- Yeah

a cool free benefit if it's true. 

Blessie: And especially for- Maybe just for the printing ... your mindset of need to gain money by- 

J.R.: Yeah ... 

Blessie: by using resources. So yeah. 

J.R.: Yeah. That's why I'm like, "Oh, I should open up YouTube 'cause I'm paying for it." I'm like, "Oh, that's dumb. Why are you doing that? Ugh, I should cancel everything and just go live in the mountains."

Anyways, so [00:27:00] what are you reading? Yeah. And so, so you got a library card and using these apps, and it's allowing you to listen to more things. So sorry, continue. 

Blessie: It is. So yeah, as, b- because I said I used to have Spotify and that would limit me with the audiobook that I'm listening to because of the au- the hours that are limited.

But with the library card I can even rewind c- 'cause I think with Spotify if you rewind and then replay it it adds to your listening time. Oh. That's my thinking.

J.R.: That's discrimination. 

Blessie: What the heck? Right. That's, but I don't know how true that is, but I feel like it is. Okay. Yeah. But anyway yeah, so I- I'm reading The Ballad of Songbirds and Snakes right now for The Hunger Games series.

I mainly started it because the movie that's coming out this year is, well, coming out this year and I wanted to hear the book about Haymitch, Haymitch's lore. So, so that was really good. I was, like, sobbing by the end of it. And then I also reread The Hunger Games, the trilogy. [00:28:00] So yeah, it was a good refresher, and especially reading books as an adult, even if you read it from back in the day.

S- a lot of the times, especially if we're not like you who does reading logs and stuff, we tend to forget what happened. We just kind of remember oh, it was good. But I don't really remember what exactly happened. Yeah. So I think it's nice to reread your favorite books from when you were younger.

Also earlier before Hunger Games, I was reading the Heated Rivalry series. 

I think for meeting my book goals, which was initially one book per month it, going through series really helped me, like- Mm

go to the next book, you know. So if you have any reading goal it's nice to pick up series. Even though in the beginning, it's intimidating for me to start a series. It actually still is, but I think for those series that just kind of end with that book, like you don't have to go to the next [00:29:00] one to...

Or you don't have to go back to any previous book to get the context, and you can just pick it up. Those are nice books for me, so I'm not pressured to read the next book or the previous book. So, so that helped me with the meeting my book goals. I'm actually, I've actually met them already.

I'm already at 12 books. Mm. And it's only May. S- So yeah. 

J.R.: And you're ex- sorry, you're exclusively listening, or is it e-book, or? 

Blessie: Listening because- 

J.R.: Okay ... 

Blessie: well, for the comic book that I'm reading it's through my iPad. 

J.R.: Right, right, right. Of course. Yeah. 

Blessie: Other than that, all the books are usually audiobooks.

I usually listen when I'm driving or working out, so. 

J.R.: Yeah. Yeah. I have the same experience when I rewatch old movies that I enjoyed, 'cause it's yeah, you can watch a new movie, but if you watch an old movie that you like, it's time well spent, I feel like, because it's- Mm-hmm ... a good experience, you know

Blessie: yeah, 'cause it's like watching it through your adult eyes com- Yeah, that's true ... compared to like when you were younger. 

J.R.: Yeah. [00:30:00] Exactly. So it's, it can be a new experience even if it was just as good, and also yeah, you could get something from it, something new from your different perspective. 

Blessie: Yeah.

J.R.: Okay. I will also link that app in the show notes, but anything we missed? 

Blessie: I went to a concert recently actually. So it's this band called The Cab.

 I went to that recently, and then also Demi Lovato. Gonna go to another one in August to see BINI, so, um, concerts are kind of my guilty pleasure, so. 

J.R.: Oh, you like, oh, you like concerts?

Blessie: I do. Yes. But not that much because they, they're expensive nowadays. 

J.R.: Yeah. So it's not that you don't like concerts.

You like concerts, but the fact that they're expensive makes you not want to go as often, or there's a threshold for you. Mm-hmm. 

So- 

Blessie: Yes ... 

J.R.: yeah, that makes sense. 

Blessie: Okay, cool. I think we have some random topics that we can kinda skim through. But the [00:31:00] first one that we kinda selected was length of songs nowadays, how... Well, I guess this is very, what's it called? Very there's a word I'm thinking of. Like prevalent, very- rampant in K-pop, which is like those short two-minute sort of songs, like the NewJeans vibe versus I've been listening to a lot of Michael Jackson and I'm like, wow, this song is like five minutes or four and a half.

J.R.: And it like, this like it's actually only a minute and a half or two minutes of singing and unique stuff, and the rest is just vibes and music just going on, which is cool. Yeah. You know, that era of music. So it's just, I don't know if it's just catering towards short attention spans and whatnot in business ROI because less money to produce it and then more money made anyways, and they're gonna skip it on Spotify, whatever. 

Blessie: I feel like in a way because the dances are getting harder and harder too, it somehow benefits the idols when it's shorter. I would say. 

J.R.: Sure. 

Blessie: Like they're, you're- Although for the [00:32:00] listener 

J.R.: Yeah. You're forcing your idols to do- Yeah, for the listener ... to do sprints and like a whole r- whole HIIT workout and they're like, "Okay, can we shorten this a little bit?"

Blessie: Yeah. Yeah. Because- Or 

J.R.: they could just have more chill routines. 

Blessie: That too, but you know, the standards are just c- just keep getting higher and higher now for K-pop compared to you know, second gen or whatever. But yeah lis- for the listeners though, yeah, it's like we're just like left starving for more.

'Cause sometimes when it's like a good song and it's only I don't know, two minutes, it's like what happened to the bridge? What happened to the pre-chorus before the chorus? And then the intro, outro. Sometimes they just kind of get to the point and then it becomes a TikTok sound and then sure it goes viral but, 

J.R.: Yeah

Blessie: yeah, the whole experience And 

then 

J.R.: I'm 

Blessie: like, 

J.R.: wait, this song has more than 30 seconds? 

Blessie: Yeah. 

J.R.: There's some songs I'm like- So yeah ... wait, there's, there's more to this song? I only really know the TikTok length of it. 

Blessie: Yeah. But yeah, it's like there's not much story really being [00:33:00] told in the music either. There's just a lot of like hype and random lyrics nowadays.

So it's very different from, yeah, from like Michael Jackson era or whatever. 

J.R.: Yeah. I will say my thoughts that I feel like s- depending on the genre too, if you look at house or EDM, like it'll go on because the point of the music is for the music, not for an idol singing it. Mm-hmm. So I get that, and I get like in even in Michael Jackson era, it's you know, it's for the music, and so he'll be riffing for a whole two verses of just his ad libs, and then it's the same chorus or whatever.

But when I listen to some let's say ballad songs, and there's more lyrics and actual performance there, like I want to hear more of the song. 

Blessie: Yeah. 

J.R.: But if it's a repetitive sort of K-pop song, then I'm like, "Yeah, I only need a minute and a half of this. I don't need a whole three minutes of this, whatever this thing that they made."

You kinda get the meat of it, and you just move on. Mm-hmm. So I get that the different types of genres and [00:34:00] intentions of the music are a little bit different, and what you get from it are different, which might lead to different lengths. 

Oh, but also on the topic of Michael Jackson, I heard that you thought he wanted to be white, and that in college that you took a class on Michael Jackson. Is this true? That's what I'm reading it in my notes.

Blessie: Interesting. Well, yes. 

J.R.: You took a whole class- 

Blessie: I 

J.R.: said- ... and you thought he wanted to be white. 

Blessie: Interesting. No, we... Hey. So- 

J.R.: Hey. 

Blessie: We studied h- we studied- Back up ... his craft, okay? We didn't really study his l- 

J.R.: You didn't study his, his ethnicity. You didn't study his race. 

Blessie: You know, you know, I can't really say because I don't think I retained too much in that class, just because not even- It's okay

just that class. Because for most of my classes in college, I don't remember too much. 

J.R.: You're like, "Hey, I don't even remember college. I was just blacked out, so if I don't remember his race and what he wanted his preferred ethnicity to be, that's not on me." 

Blessie: No, but yeah. [00:35:00] Sadly, f- only after watching Michael movie twice did I- 

J.R.: After the second time you're like, "Wait-

Blessie: learn that he had a skin condition ... 

J.R.: he didn't want to be white?" After this three-hour movie? Hmm. 

Blessie: You guys, it's a common misconception, and I've, I was also a victim, okay? Please forgive. 

J.R.: I didn't take, I didn't take a Michael Jackson class, and I knew. 

Blessie: Please forgive. 

J.R.: I, actually- We don't- ... the reason why I, the reason why I knew that is because when I used to watch Boondocks, I think I... you haven't seen it before, right? It's like a Cartoon Network sort of, may- maybe a Cartoon Network, but it was a, an animated TV show, like a cartoon, and it's it's a comedy a lot of humor and stuff like that. And then one of the characters, he was like this racist Black guy, but he had the same vitiligo or whatever it's called, of the skin-whitening thing.

And so they would always reference, "Oh, it's Michael Jackson. I got the same thing." So, a- as a kid, I kind of already- Uh-huh ... knew based on that reference point. But maybe if I didn't watch that, I probably would also not really know, but who knows? I mean, I... It's not like I took a [00:36:00] Michael Jackson class or anything, so what would I know about that?

Blessie: The only takeaway I had in that class is because we did a- How to dance Thriller? I, I sent it to you. But yes, we did a flash mob at school, so that was fun. The only rare times that I was able to dance in college, so. But yeah. Nice. Anyway, Michael movie was great. Let's all watch it again. 

J.R.: Yeah. Let's figure out what his ethnicity is.

Blessie: He's Black. 

J.R.: Um,

Okay. Yeah. Oh, wow. You learned. So let's see.

GOAT discussion. So I mean, I had this topic and you said you thought it was interesting, but so the question... Not the question, but the idea is discussions on being a GOAT. So people say "Oh, the greatest of all time in this sport or this music or business or whatever."

And why I feel like it's hard to compare when people say, "Oh, who's your top five?" And, "Oh, this person's the greatest of all time." I don't know. I feel like a lot of times it's apples and oranges, but what are your thoughts on it? [00:37:00] 

Blessie: Yeah. Well, going back to Michael, It's like a lot of newer art- or our generation's artists are trying to compare, but it's like it's it is hard to compare because it's like the way that music is distur- distributed nowadays is very different from back in the day when you, people had to like physically buy albums and stuff.

As compared to now where it's like streaming, which, yeah it's not comparable because the environments are different for one, and the impact of the artist is also very different. So like for example, for Michael the reason why he's like the greatest of all time for most people is because of the impact that he gave to the world with his music, where he doesn't just create for himself.

It feels like if he's... He's like tackling like societal issues too with his music and being very [00:38:00] inclusive. He's a great entertainer, as you know, he, as we've seen. So yeah, it's very hard to compare with the, with artists nowadays. 

J.R.: Yeah, 'cause he was a trailblazer in a sense of like how you don't really have trailblazers nowadays because- That too

people like Michael Jackson paved the way, and people model after him. Like the Ushers, the Justin Biebers, the Chris Browns, the Bruno Marses are modeled and are like iterations of, or they are like directly stemmed from Michael Jackson's influence and how he's done things and how he's performed and how he kind of brought...

So there's just so many different aspects of that, and I think one thing I'll throw on top of that is, so even let's just say in sports, let's go to basketball to another Michael, Michael Jordan. And when people say, "Oh, the greatest of all time in this sport," let's say Michael Jordan, you can compare rings, meaning like how many times they won the championships, [00:39:00] the, whatever it's called in basketball when they win.

But yeah, so the reason why I say it's hard to compare GOATs is because I think, one, everyone stands on top of the shoulders of giants, and so in your era- Yeah ... you have built a foundation that now later eras build on top of. And so rules change over time, music changes from, you know, records to streaming.

The rules of the, of the games change, and then also the people you're playing with are different. And so you could be first place in your era, but would you be first place in another era? And that's obviously impossible. It's a thought experiment. If LeBron James had to play the same rules as the Michael Jordan era, and he had to play against the same sort of people with the same teammates that Michael Jordan had, would he be as successful?

And so there's so many variables there that the GOAT discussions are always very difficult because of there's so many elements of change in the era and the evolution of each thing, and then the situations that were surrounding it. Mm-hmm. And my thoughts are that I [00:40:00] think if you do really well in your era based on what you have, I think you can just cut it at that and be like, "You were the greatest of that era and this era."

Mm-hmm. And then people can have their opinions on, okay, well, if you had to stack rank eras and the greatest of those ones, how would they rank? And it could be just a thought experiment, but I don't think you can ever really make a good argument for oh yeah, the person who was the best musici- musical artist in the 1920s is the greatest of all time, and screw someone like you know, Taylor Swift in the tw- 2020s.

Because it's like it's so different, and genres change and the rules change, like I said. And so that's why I thought of this question is like it's hard to have these comparisons. I know they're more fun than anything, but- Mm-hmm ... when people say those things, it's kinda like, you know there's a fallacy behind your logic that it doesn't make sense to compare them.

Blessie: Mm-hmm. 

J.R.: So. 

Blessie: Yeah. It's so true. Yeah. He did pave the way for Michael, I mean, even K-pop in general 

J.R.: Yeah. Yeah, and K-pop's [00:41:00] obviously... I mean, K-pop is directly influenced and born from Black music anyway, so it's like, all right. Yeah. I was thinking about it, like there was that era of Michael Jackson, Michael Jordan, those videos of them like kind of doing stuff together, and then you had Mike Tyson, and I keep seeing all these reels- Oh

I'm like, damn, this era of Mikes are just insane because they were just the top of the world. They were like titans in what they did, and they were like, you know- Mm-hmm ... fairly young and just y- And I'm like, dang, that, that would've been a crazy time to be alive. And the amount- Yeah ... of celebrities that went to Mike Tyson's fights too, and you have the peop- minus Michael Jackson, you have everyone else, like all these movie stars, celebrities, athletes going to his fight, and it's that- Yeah

sort of... Yeah, I don't know. It would've been insane to be in that era. 

 Okay. Um, Last topic or last thing is a quote that you liked that I had written down in my random show topics, which is, "Grief is just love with no place to go." Do you have any thoughts on that?

Blessie: Yeah. Well, it's true. It's no one is there to receive your [00:42:00] love, so it's like where, like who, where else can that be placed? It's and it doesn't really go away when you're grieving someone. You just kind of live around it, around the grief. At least that's what I learned from losing a family member.

You can share it with the other people who love them also. But it's not the same as expressing it to the person that you love because they're no longer there.

J.R.: I was gonna ask, do you have any examples that other people might have to relate to this, or advice on how to deal with grief?

Because obviously grief can take shape with different types of relationships or situations. 'Cause it could just be grief over the loss of a job, you know, over, of a situation- Mm-hmm ... or a time in your life, or, you know, just random things like that. 

Blessie: I think you just, you go through those [00:43:00] stages anyway, and you just have to live through them 'cause there's no other way around it. Like you accept that loss, and distractions help in a way. Um, like shifting, Shifting that attention to other important things in your life. And acknowledging that, I guess that love for that thing or that person is always gonna be there.

Like it's not completely lost. Like you still have the memory of that thing or that person in your, like heart or memory. If you focus on the fact that they're just gone, like you're just gonna be sad.

J.R.: Yeah. I think my thoughts are-- I mean, I agree. I think my thoughts are maybe what would be valuable in this quote is the perspective of usually [00:44:00] when people are grieving or in that state of grief or sadness, it's obviously seen as a negative thing, and we don't want to be grieving, and it sucks, and it's bad.

But I think the grief is the sign of the love, which is something that you shouldn't necessarily run away from. It's kind of like feeling your feelings. Grief is a sign that there was love there, and therefore it's a good thing.

So it's okay to grieve, and you should go through your grief and whatnot, but also know that that is the other side of the coin of love.

And so therefore, we should have gratitude for it, right? Not being grateful for the grief, but being grateful in the grief because we know that it was evidence of a good thing.

I guess that's what I'm trying to take away from, or that's what I take away from it, is a reframe of something like grief, knowing we typically see it as a negative thing, is actually evidence of a positive, beautiful thing.

Blessie: That's true. 

J.R.: Yeah. So anyways, well, that is it. [00:45:00] Anything else that you feel like we left out? Otherwise, we can wind this to a close 

Blessie: I think that's it. That's all I can think of. 

J.R.: Sweet. No worries. All right we end with gratitude, so shout out to my mom.

What are you grateful for, Blessie? 

Blessie: I am grateful for good health as always, 'cause the things that we're able to do with good health is like we, we tend to take it for granted sometimes, but I'm always grateful for that. And yeah, the people who are around me still so your family, you friends and music I guess gets me through.

Grateful for that. 

J.R.: Nice.

Okay. Final ask from the audience or final takeaways? 

Blessie: Just do it. Start whatever follow your dreams. Cliché things. 

J.R.: Yeah. You definitely need to wear more Nike. Okay. All right, I will link your social media in the description. So thank you, Blessie, for being here.

I appreciate it. It was a very fun conversation of catching up and then some [00:46:00] random topics. So, hopefully you had fun as well.

So I'll wrap it up for my audience. So thank you guys for being here. I really appreciate it. Be sure to like, follow, subscribe. Leave us five stars on whatever platform you're listening to.

Leave us love in the comments. Leave Blessie love in the comments so she'll see it. Reminder to always be kind to other people, especially yourself, and remember that you can always learn something from someone if you take the time to listen. So thank you guys for being here. 

Blessie: Bye. Thanks for having me.